Page 100 of His Vicious Desire
“I believe we make things harder than they need to be.”
The next day, as I get to the restaurant almost ten minutes early, I’m hoping he’s right.Maybe he is, because instead of me waiting for Sandro, he’s already waiting for me.
His eyes widen when he sees me.I go easily into the arms he holds out to me.It’s been a long time since I’ve gotten a hug from him, and I hate that I burst into tears the minute he closes his arms around me.
“I’m sorry.”
“Hey, don’t worry about it.Carina was in tears when I didn’t immediately kiss her the moment I came through the door last night.I’m surprised by how different you look.”He helps me into the seat across from him.
I run a hand over my large stomach.“Well, I am about to pop.So a little different.”
Shaking his head.“It’s not you pregnant.You’re just…I don’t know, different.Gaetano has been good for you.”
“Yes, he has.From the very beginning.It’s why I was so certain he was what I wanted.He didn’t have to be, and he fought against what he felt.”
“I wanted to say I was sorry about all the shit Mom and Dad?—”
Laying my hand on his, I shake my head.“Don’t apologize for them.There’s nothing for you to say sorry for.That was all them.You were the only reason I had a somewhat normal childhood.Which is why when Carina appeared and you were so…”
“I screwed up, with both you and Carina.It wasn’t easy to see because I was fighting against loving her.She was all I saw and all I cared about in the moment.I took your love and trust for granted because I always saw you as there, but in the background, because you weren’tsupposedto be in my world.I always believed I would be on the periphery of your world, a two-point-three kids, husband with an office in the corner, civilian world.The thing I forgot was to tell you that.”He sighs.
It isn’t easy to see him as the tears won’t stop falling.
“It never crossed my mind to tell you.A part of me was worried you would think I didn’t want you in my life.Another part of me believed that’s what happens when you grow up, you grow apart.Gradually, slowly, perhaps, but I didn’t think anything else was an option because of the promise I made Mom.Now that I know what she said—fuck that.Whatever life you want to live is up to you.”
“I want more than two-point-three kids, and I want our kids to grow up together, to play together.For us to argue about whose house we cook out next weekend.I want to trade weekends for me and Carina to get a break from our kids.That’s the life I want to live.”
“Sounds like a pretty good life.Since we’re having girls and they’re far easier, it’s going to be a two-to-one situation.We’re also always going to cook out at your place because Gaetano is an amazing cook.”
I laugh.“We’ll see about that.”
I’m still smiling when Gaetano gets home hours later.The moment he walks into the house, he pulls me into his arms and onto his lap.Pressing a kiss to my stomach, he greets our son.I have to admit it’s the most adorable thing, the way he talks to my stomach.One of the books he read suggested it, and so every night he took time to talk to our baby.Sometimes he told him about his day, and other times he told him about how to beat his Uncle Nico at chess.
A hand goes into my hair to hold me still as he kisses me gently.“How are you feeling?”
“Good.I had a really good talk with Sandro.And I think we’re going to be okay.”
He shakes his head.“Not good, you’re going to be great.”
“The same we’re going to be?”
“Almost as great as us.”
“Even if I had lost him, you would have been worth it.Being loved by you is better than…” For once, I’m lost for words.
Running a hand through my hair, he shakes his head.“I understand.As much as I saw him as my brother, you’re my heart, the blood that flows through my veins.Nothing in this world comes before you—not even me.”
Gaetano
We find a house close to the hotel on the strip, so it’s only a fifteen-minute drive.Thankfully, the only thing that needs to be done is some painting and putting up wallpaper.
There’s also the need to build cat trees for the laziest cats I’ve encountered in my life.I broke down and got Bianca the cats she’s always wanted.She chose two of the long-haired Ragdoll cats that were constantly at her side.They annoyed me because I had to remove one to get to her.
Bianca was so grateful for the cats, I felt guilty that I took so long to get them.Especially when I always knew I was going to get her one.Since I remembered the way she said she wanted one, the minute she got her own place.So they were always going to be something she would get.
Although it took a minute to get used to the balls of fur in the house.Sasha and Minka were kind of cute.
Only two weeks before Bianca’s due date, everything is perfect in the house.
