Page 36 of Cognac Secrets
“What if I want to make love to you?” he asked, nuzzling the side of my neck, sending a wash of goosebumps down that side of my body, sweeping over my shoulder and down my back.
I froze as the words he’d just spoken crashed into my reality. Confused, I captured his face with my hands and drew back to look at him.
“That’s relationship shit,” I said softly, my heart breaking as I said it with just how much Iwantedit, but knowing that it could never really be. I was too fucked up for that and I knew it.
“You’re right,” he said and he looked slightly dismayed.
“I thought that’s not what you wanted,” I said, quickly trying to clarify, because color me confused.
“Just got carried away,” he said softly. “In the moment.”
I smiled then. I couldn’t help it, and said, “Okay, please, do go on. I liked where it was going. I just… I don’t want to mess things up, and I feel like I maybe just did.”
“Shhh,” he soothed. “No, you didn’t. I did. Poor choice of words. I’m sorry for the confusion.”
I nodded and he brought his lips to mine and kissed me again. Once, twice, and on the third kiss, I pulled him to me and we mutually plunged our tongues past each other’s teeth to passionately crash together.
All thought, all words, flew out of my brain at that point. Legitimately, I didn’t have a care in the world after that.
I didn’t know where he came up with the condom, the rattle of the wrapper suddenly loud as he reached down between us, tearing it open blindly. He wouldn’t stop kissing me, and I was grateful for it, because I was slightly afraid that I would never want this man to stop kissing me, and I low key hated myself for it.
God, how I wore my heart on my sleeve, and how I wanted to love someone and be loved. But history so often repeated itself, and I’d been hurt so much, I was so afraid to try again. And that’snot what he wanted.Still, by the time he tore his mouth from mine and lined his cock up at my entrance, I had myself convinced that I could silently pretend… just when we were like this… couldn’t I?
“Oh, God!” I cried out when he slid his length into my pussy. His girth had been just enough to make my jaw ache when I’d had him in my mouth and my throat, but I hadn’t thought it overly substantial. My pussy stretching and filling with him begged to differ, however.
He feltthick, andlong, and as he pushed his way to the root of himself inside me, I almost feared he would bottom out against my cervix, which could be painful in a not fun way if I wasn’t in the mood for it. But, no, I apparently fit him like a glove, because he would have toreallyhit it hard to bottom out – which could be fun, but not right now.
His words about making love to me echoed in my mind which had gone pleasantly blank under his control, and he seemed to want to do just that, striking a slow, even, cadence. One that was setting me onfirein a delicious slow burn that felt like it would keep me warm on the coldest, darkest, night of the soul.
It didn’t help how he held me, one of his arms delved deep behind my back, his hand gripping the back of my neck as he rolled his hips in this way thatGod,he was certainly doingall the thingsto me, in a way I couldn’t even speak on. His other hand palmed the outside of my thigh, smoothing up and down the outside of my leg in a way that made me gasp and my breath catch all at once.
“Good girl,” he breathed next to my ear. “Good girl, yeah.”
I swallowed hard, my arms going around him, my nails biting into his ass to urge him on as I begged,“Harder, please!”in a slightly panicked and breathy voice, suddenly a little scared at how I was feeling, at the way the walls I’d carefully erected about me started to crumble, letting the starlight outside shine softly in.
No one had ever felt this… thisdeepbefore, and I’m not talking physically. This was something else, something so different, so disarming, so…mm!
He rolled his hips, just a little bit more side to side and it swished him inside me in such a way that it left me gasping and panting. I had never felt such a pleasure from penetration alone and it was catching me off guard in a most delightful way.
“Bennie!” I panted and hated how I sounded a little panicked, but all he did was chuckle by my ear and nuzzle into me, brushing aside my hair from my neck with his face, his hand gripping the back of it a little tighter, massaging, as his lips gently attacked that spot on the side that sent me wild.
Oh,fuck, he knew just how to push my buttons, and that scared me just a little bit. I’d never had anyone so solidly justdo the right things, or honestly,really careif they did. Sure, I had some guys work really hard at getting me off, but that wasn’t so much aboutmeas it was about another notch on their belt, or a point of pride for them.
Maybe it was just me. Maybe I really was the problem in those scenarios, but I didn’t know. All I did know washoly wow,Bennie was attentive andfunand I didn’t want this toeverstop.
I ran my foot up his calf, and he groaned, nibbling on the side of my neck, and making me shudder beneath him. This was definitelydifferent. I had never in my life felt the feelings he was wringing out of me. I had never felt the pleasure lap at my shore in steady building waves… like I was floating in warmth and comfort, the sharp, clean scent of his cologne swirling around my being and taking me higher, the tide rising, the salt sparkling through my veins.
His body against mine, inside mine, pushing and pulling me like taffy, molding me into a form I had no name for, taking me to places and heights I’d never felt before, everything building, building, building, so slowly, so wonderfully, sointimately.
When I came, it wasn’t like it crashed over me. It was like it welled, like blood from a cut, that moment where you rode the razor’s edge, that shining silver moment of being suspended in time, holding your breath, wondering if you really had been cut, before the blood welled hot and fresh and spilled. Only instead of blood, this was sheer, unadulterated,pleasure,sweeping out from my center and through my limbs, contracting my pussy around his thick cock and sucking it.
He groaned in my ear and held me tighter, held me closer. I felt him shudder against me and realized that he was coming too.
I didn’t ever recall a time I’d done that, either. Come in perfect synchronicity with a partner, and it was absolutely everything I imagined it would be and still somehowbetter.
We lay together, in a tangle of limbs, each of us breathing hard. His body pressed me into the cloud of a bed beneath me, and I didn’t mind at all. It didn’t feel oppressive or claustrophobic at all. It feltnice.It feltgood.I felt safe and cherished, and I could so easily fall prey to my own mind trying desperately to make things more than what they were… to let me almost feelloved.
I knew it was absurd, that we barely knew each other, and that this wasn’t what that was, butdamn it…
