My heart melted when she wrapped her arms around my neck. Instinctively, I pulled her into my arms and squeezed as much as I could without hurting her. Call it a mother's intuition, but I felt a strong connection to her even though I remembered nothing about her.
"Are you okay, Mommy?" Nia wiggled in my arms and sat on my lap.
I ran my hand over her curly hair and looked down at her. She looked just like me, but she had Noah's eyes.
Noah's eyes were filled with concern when he looked at me again as tears streamed down my face. I wasn't okay, but Icouldn't tell Nia that because she wouldn't understand. I had to be strong for her.
I plastered on the biggest smile that I could. "Yes, Mommy is perfect."
I hugged her and looked up at Noah. He smiled at me and winked, but I could see the uncertainty in his eyes. I wasn't sure how we would get through this, but I was determined to do everything possible to recover my memories.
A few days later,Dr. Stralkus felt Carsyn was well enough to be released from the hospital. She hadn't regained her memory, but the doctor said it would take some time to get it back if it returned at all. For the most part, Carsyn had been sleeping and spending time with her mom and sister. I was there, but we didn't talk as much. I wanted her to have that time with them because we would have time to talk once we got home.
I also wanted to get the house together for her. I wanted the transition to be as easy as possible. She didn't have any physical restraints, but the doctor told us that she should rest as much as she could. There was a chance of a severe headache and maybe some dizziness, but other than that, she should be okay. Theyprescribed some pain medicine and gave us plenty of resources to use.
Although I didn't show it, I was worried. I couldn't let Carsyn go through this by herself, but I had to be honest and admit I didn't know how we would get through this.
Nia was with our families to give Carsyn time to get acclimated to the house. I wasn't sure how well she would do once we got home, and I didn't want to overwhelm her with getting used to the house and having to deal with Nia. We might have whoever has her bring her over for a couple of hours, but we would play it by ear.
I cleaned the house from top to bottom and went grocery shopping. I didn't want to leave Carsyn's side for anything over the first few days of her being home. I would do everything I could to make her comfortable.
Once the house was set, I headed to the hospital. During the entire drive there, I prayed that Carsyn would be okay and that her transition home would go smoothly. I was thankful that she was comfortable enough to go home with me, even if she couldn't remember everything. It would have killed me if she wanted to go to her parents' or sister's house. It was bad enough that she didn't remember me, but I wouldn't be able to handle it if she didn't want to be in the home we shared.
Since the incident happened, I prayed and wished that she would get her memory back. And I prayed for the strength to have patience with her.
When I arrived at the hospital, I parked in the visitors' parking lot and got out. It was a nice day outside, and I knew the sunlight would do Carsyn some good. I knew she was tired of sitting in that hospital room. At least her room had a window so she could look outside, but it wasn't anything like letting the sun kiss your skin.
After I checked in at the visitor's desk, I got on the elevator to the fourth floor.
Carsyn was dressed and sitting up when I entered the room. My muscles relaxed when she looked up at me, and her eyes brightened. I didn't even realize I was that tense. I was nervous about how things would go and how she would react once we got home.
"How are you feeling?" I asked Carsyn as I got close. I wanted to kiss her like I normally did, but I wasn't sure if it would be too much for her. Instead, I sat in the chair near her bed. She looked like she was unsure of what she should say or do.
"I'm okay. Nervous but also happy to be leaving here. The staff was nice, but the food wasn't that great. This bed wasn't that comfortable either." She giggled.
"I can imagine. The bed at home is comfortable, and you'll love it. The food there is much better too." I winked at her.
There was a look on her face that I couldn't decipher, but then she smiled and said, "Okay." She brushed her hand over the sheet on the bed. "Where's Nia?"
"She's with my father and my Aunt Grace. She'll stay with them for a couple of days, then your parents will get her. If at any time you want to see her, someone will bring her to the house. I just didn't want you to get overstimulated too soon."
I wanted to assure Carsyn that I wasn't trying to keep Nia from her. She already seemed a little skeptical about me, and I didn't want to give her the wrong impression. Whatever she needed me to do to make her feel comfortable, I would do.
"Oh, okay. I'm sure that's a good idea. I can't wait to get to know her, though. You too," she added.
Carsyn's bright smile gave me hope that things would work out for the good.
I got up from the chair and approached her. She blinked fast a couple of times but didn't look away.
"I'm willing to answer any questions you may have and fill in any blanks that may be missing."
She looked up at me, and I smiled. There was still some bruising under her eye from that fight, but that didn't take away from her beauty. My wife had always been so beautiful to me, and her dealing with all this like a champ made her that much more attractive.
There was a knock at the door, so I stepped back to answer it, but the person opened it before I got there.
It was one of the nurses.
"Hi, Mrs. Ross. I'm glad you're here, Mr. Ross. Escort is on their way up, but I wanted to give you both the discharge instructions," she announced as she walked near the bed.
