Page 121 of Heavy
“Feel better?”
“Not particularly.” She turns to face me, her expression filled with that cute rage. I just know if she had to fight, she could, I’ve seen it. I don’t know much about zodiac signs, but she blames it on being a Cancer.
“Alright, well why were they here asking you about the fire?”
She diverts her eyes, andimmediately, I know she’s about to lie to me. “I have no idea.”
Grabbing her chin, I bring her attention back to me. Her cheeks flush as I ask again. “Why were they here asking about the fire, Calista?” Gone is the playfulness from earlier, because she knows better. I don’t do this—wedon’t do this. She tells me the truth, and I turn my life around for her.
That’s our deal.
Yet… she does it again.
“I’m serious, Ronan, I have no idea.” Even if this is more convincing than the last, I just feel she’s lying. No, I know she is, and a small pit forms right in the center of my chest.
“Why are you lying?”
She shakes her head because I release her and step back. “I—I’m not. I swear.”
I want to make her swear on her feelings for me. Swear on what we’ve built between us, but the unfamiliar feeling of fear keeps my mouth shut.
Her lips slightly part and her eyes widen as though she, too, is terrified.
Taking a deep breath, I close my eyes.Don’t lie to me…
“I have to see my mom this evening…” She of course moves onto another subject. “I’ll only be a few hours. I’m not going to stay the night, but I need to get ready and go now.”
Feeling her step to me, I don’t look at her, just feel her presence. The warmth of her hand nearing my cheek has me lifting mine and pressing it over hers to feel her palm against me.
Please, don’t lie to me.
“One last time, Cal…” I open my eyes to gaze into hers. “Why would they be asking about the fire after so long?”
Her bottom lip trembles, but she gives me a smile that tells me that pit is going to turn quickly into a black hole.
“Maybe they just need to finish up the final details… Baby, it’s nothing.”
Nothing… Fuck, I hate that response.
“It was an accident you said, right?”
She nods and quickly gets to her tiptoes to press her lips to mine.
Little liar… Damn it, Cal.
38
Calista
Thisisn’tgood.
Goddamn them, they said they took care of the fucking police! That it didn’t matter the outcome of their blackmail, they’d take care of me.
But who am I kidding? I ghosted them, told them I wouldn’t fulfill what they asked of me. Why did I think they’d keep their end when I didn’t keep mine?
I never wanted this, and now I’m stuck between a hard place and Ronan. If I tell him the truth, hewillleave me. It doesn’t matter the reason, because I’d do the same. There are no redeemable qualities in me after what I’ve done, and now, if the police suspect that I’ve set my townhouse on fire, everything will come to light.
I’m so fucked.
