I shook my head.“Take these off.”I got his foot up and slid the jeans and boxers free.Then I repeated the process.I tried to swallow him again, but he was still trying to stop me, so I licked the tip and gave him a push toward the bed.“Lie down.”
“I already dropped out of the call.We don’t have to rush.”He ran his hands over my shoulders and played with the tank’s straps again.“I miss spending time with you.”
After a deep breath, I managed to say, “I know.I just want you really bad right now.”I took another breath; the taste of his dick lingered in my mouth.“I need you.Lie down.”
He let me nudge him toward the bed, and while he made himself comfortable—propping himself up on the pillows, lacing his fingers behind his head—I grabbed the lube.It was where it always was.Where it had been the last time we’d used it, however long ago that had been.I wondered if this was what he’d used with Tip, but I couldn’t remember how much had been left.Maybe the little faggot had come greased for action.Or maybe he liked it rough.
I climbed up to straddle Darnell, warming lube in my hand.
“Come here,” he said in that rumbly whisper.“I want to kiss you.”
If I opened my mouth, I wasn’t sure what would come out, so I shook my head.I wrapped a hand around his dick, stroking him as I lubed him up.I swiped a little more around my hole.
“Come here, sweetie.”
I scooted backward and lowered myself onto his dick.I was going too fast, and I was still tender from Sunny; the stretch and burn were more intense than I usually liked.Right then, though, I wanted it.I dropped down onto his dick, and the pain went through my head like a red wave.I heard myself make a noise.
“You okay?Here, ease up—”
But I shook my head again and settled with him fully inside me.I was flushed.My chest was pink, and I could feel my heartbeat in my face.Darnell was saying something, but I couldn’t process the words.He ran one hand over my belly.I thought he was telling me it was okay.
By moments and by degrees, my body relaxed.Then I started to move.At first, I thought the rawness and the sensitivity were going to be too much.But when I shifted position and he started to hammer my bitch switch, I moaned.I heard myselfas though from a distance and thought, I sound like a real whore.And then, even more clearly, I guess he likes that.
He did like it, because he gripped my hips so tightly that his fingers bit into my flesh, and once he could tell I was really going, he started to move with me—thrusting up and pulling me down hard, coordinating our movements so that it felt like my body was one raw nerve being pounded over and over again.
His color was high, and even though he wasn’t doing most of the work, he was sweating.He muttered, “Oh shit,” and his fingers tightened on my hips.
I squeezed around him as tightly as I could, and I rose and fell faster.He rolled his head back.I saw his O-face.I wondered if Tip had seen it too.
Then it was over, and he was blinking rapidly, huffing for breath.He was trying to keep going like a good little soldier, but I stopped moving and settled down on him again.I was surprised my dick was hard, but I guess he was being a good little soldier too.I hadn’t expected to come.That was kind of a bonus.
I jerked myself off and came on his belly—a shallow pool that spilled to roll down his side and onto the bedding.I was breathing hard.I could smell my own sweat now and the reek of our sex, and pinpricks ran across my chest and face.
When I got off him, I couldn’t help a wince and a soft sound.
Darnell steadied me, hands still on my hips.“Are you okay?”
I nodded.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
I shook my head.
“We were both so revved up.”
I was suddenly tired.So much for post-nut clarity; this was post-nut exhaustion.I was more tired than I’d ever been, and instead of my original plan, I found myself lying down, letting Darnell pull me against him.He was sticky with sweat, and my load was already cooling.He rubbed my belly a few more times, and then he pulled me even more tightly against him.
“I miss you,” he whispered, and I could hear in his voice that he was on that sleepy edge that came for so many guys after a fuck.
I closed my eyes so I didn’t have to say anything.
Sleep washed in and out like a dark tide, and I lay there with the painstaking clarity that came, asI’d learned this last year, during the midnight hours—the unreal sense of being hyperawake, even as I drifted and dozed.
What are you doing, I asked myself.What do you think you’re doing?
Something stupid.
And then I really did sleep.I knew, because the nightmare was an old one.At one point in my life, not so long ago, I thought I’d finally outgrown it.
