Page 61 of The Duke and the Hellion Bride
He did not answer right away and because she was not looking at him, terror enveloped her. Her mind raced as she imagined the coldness in his eyes, the dispassion. Him stopping their dance, stepping away, telling her that she is getting ahead of herself, and that this was not part of the deal!
The silence grew and she forced herself to look at him. His expression was unreadable, which only made things worse.
“Admittedly, I had not considered it,” he said evenly.
“Which part?”
“The... the heir,” he said. “Of course I wish to take you to bed. To make you mine – what sane man wouldn’t,” he joked, although it sounded forced. “But an heir...”
“Is that not something you might want, one day?”
He considered her closely. As he did, the music began to slow, as did their movements. Soon, the two stood perfectly still, holding one another as they had been, eyes locked, breaths held, the world around them unimportant because this moment right here would come to define everything.
“I...” He licked his lips. “I do. Yes, I... I would very much like that.”
Diana beamed and if it was not for all the people watching, she would have kissed him. “Tonight?” she asked instead. “Shall we...” She looked away and then looked back. “If the mood takes you?”
He chuckled deeply, one hand now rising and resting on the side of her face. “The mood does take me, Diana. Where you are concerned, it always does.”
* * *
They spoke of little on the ride home, for which Diana was grateful. Did Diana enjoy herself? Was her dress the hit that she had hoped? And Magnus’ insistence that she meet his best friend, Earl Northwood soon, because the two had similar personalities and Magnus was all but certain they would get along famously.
To Diana, it felt like conversation for the pure purpose of filling the silence, which told her that even Magnus was nervous about what they were heading home to do. Surely, not as nervous as she was?
If they were going to be purely sleeping together as man and wife, she would be nervous enough, for Diana was a virgin and despite how much she had experienced of late, sex was a whole new world to her, and she was infinitely aware of how little she knew of the matter. A novice, unlearned, likely to do something that would mortify her beyond comprehension. She just hoped that Magnus took the lead.
This was about more than sex. He had agreed that they should begin trying to produce an heir, an acknowledgment that this marriage was very much the real deal, and from tonight there would be no going back.
Not that Diana wished to go back, of course. It was just that... well... the permanence of it all was suddenly hitting as she had not expected. After tonight, nothing would be the same. All she could do was remind herself that this was what she wanted.
When they arrived home, Magnus was the first to climb from the carriage. Then, he silently took her hand and helped her down. From there, still in silence, they walked into the manor and up the stairs toward the bedroom. The hallway seemed longer than usual, every step taken creaking the floorboards loudly. Diana began to sweat, began to shake, forcing herself into composure because she did not want to appear afraid.
Inside the room, Magnus lead Diana forwards before turning back and closing the door. The sound of it shutting had her jumping in fright.
“Careful,” Magnus said, his first words in minutes. “I do not want you tripping and hurting yourself.”
She tried for a smile. “I... I am fine.”
He frowned at the response. “I did not think you were not.”
“I...” Diana shook her head at herself and focused on her husband. He looked the same as he always did, the man who she had fallen in love with. Tall and imposing. Dark and rugged. But also compassionate, caring, not someone she needed to be scared around. She thought back to earlier with her mother, how he had saved her, and she met his eyes and reminded herself why she was the one who initiated this in the first place.
“Is everything alright?” he asked.
“Magnus, I have a small confession...” She spoke softly, surely such that the beating of her heart could be heard.
“Oh?”
“I am...” She grimaced. “I would be lying if I said I was not nervous.”
“I didn’t think that was possible for you.”
“Of course it is,” she snapped.
He chuckled. “There is nothing to be nervous about.”
“Easy for you to say,” she sighed. “I am sure you have bedded dozens of women.” His brow creased and her eyes widened. “I did not mean – I simply meant, this is not the same for you as it is for me. And I know it is foolish for me to act this way, that there is nothing to fear but... but... well, I am. And I cannot help that. And now I am rambling, and I cannot stop and if you wish to leave, I fully understand. In fact, I expect you to. Nor will I hold it against you.”
