Page 59 of Can't Win 'Em All
My lips quirked. “That sounds about right,” I acknowledged. “I don’t remember what happened when I got to your door. That’s all a blur. I don’t understand how I got inside.”
She didn’t say anything. She just waited.
“I do remember being inside and … the stuff that came after.” I wagged my finger in exaggerated fashion. “You remember the stuff too. I know you do.”
“Dude, if you’re going to have a baby, I think you should be able to talk about sexual stuff without acting like a twelve-your-old boy,” Livvie hissed. “You’re embarrassing me.”
I didn’t care. The only thing I cared about in this moment was being right. And how obnoxious was that? I’ll tell you how obnoxious. It was very obnoxious … and yet that didn’t stop me. “She had orgasms,” I insisted. “That’s orgasms plural. I don’t want her telling people that I didn’t give her orgasms.”
“Oh, geez.” Ruby relaxed, if only marginally, and rolled her eyes. “Is that what this is all about? Are you afraid word will get out that the orgasms were missing and it will somehow ruin your game? You need to give it a rest.” She clucked her tongue as she shook her head. “I guarantee, no matter what, women will still throw themselves at you.”
I didn’t care about women throwing themselves at me. I cared about this woman. This maddeningly hot and annoying woman. “There were orgasms.” I refused to let it go. “Just acknowledge that, and we’ll go back to shopping.”
Ruby snorted. “So, basically, you’re saying that you want me to lie. Is that what I’m hearing?”
My ego was taking a bruising here. “Listen?—”
“Rex, you need to stop,” Livvie hissed, her cheeks flooding with color. “Let it go. It’s normal for people not to be on top of their games when they’re having drunk sex. It’s hardly the end of the world.”
That was easy for her to say. Of course, it was mortifying that she was saying it to me. “Stay out of it,” I ordered my sister. I was deadly serious when I turned back to Ruby. “I know you didn’t forget the orgasms. I don’t know why you’re pretending right now, but I don’t like it.”
“And I think this is the weirdest conversation I’ve ever had,” Ruby said. “What is the matter with you, Rex? I’ve never seen you like this.”
It was a good question. I did not have a proper answer. All I knew was she’d flipped a switch inside my head. Now I was going to think about things I shouldn’t be thinking about. This was all her fault.
And no matter what she was saying, there were orgasms. They were damned good orgasms at that.
“Whatever.” I clutched my Elvis mobile to my chest. “There were orgasms, though. Stop pretending there weren’t.”
16
SIXTEEN
Iglared at Ruby across the casino floor. Days after our shopping trip, I remained mad. Sure, I was still taking her catered lunches—Livvie reminded me that she was going to have to push out a baby with my big head every chance she got—but I was mad.
No, I was insulted.
How could she not remember the orgasms? Sure, in the haze of the morning after, I could forgive her being confused. I was confused that morning too.
I never forgot the orgasms though. I pretended to in the moment—beating my chest like King Kong and claiming myself as the sexual god of the casino would’ve been in poor taste—but I never truly forgot.
How could Ruby?
“What’s with that face?” Cal Preston, my second-in-command, asked as he joined me near the cashier station.
“Hmm?” I dragged my eyes from Ruby, who was yukking it up with a handful of servers, and focused on his face. “Do you need something?”
“Yeah, I want to know why you’re making that face.” Cal had an easygoing nature. He often made jokes about my luck with the women who came into the casino—all the single ones somehow made up an excuse to talk to me, or even take a selfie with me—but he was no slouch in that department even though he wasn’t as good looking as me. He said that, not me. I didn’t make it a habit to go around judging my employees by their looks.
“I wasn’t making a face,” I lied, darting a look toward Ruby. Under the muted lights of the casino floor—they were designed to keep the guests guessing about the time of day so they didn’t leave to enjoy prime gambling time on the strip—she looked even more breathtaking than usual. How was that even possible? She spent half her time complaining about not being able to sleep because our daughter was doing handsprings on her bladder and yet she looked like a dream.
My dream to be exact.
Except my dream would never forget the orgasms. What was the matter with her? She was messing with me. There could be no other explanation.
“I was just running through a to-do list in my head,” I said finally. “We have another convention coming in tomorrow.”
“Yes, the unidentical identical twins convention.” Cal bobbed his head. “I’m not even sure how something like that works. Is it like when one twin gets fat and the other doesn’t?”
