Page 66 of Cross the Line
‘I’ve been wanting to do that again since last year,’ he murmurs, his lips a whisper away from my own.
I release my hold on his hair and slide my hands to his chest, fingers curling into his race suit. I’m still lightheaded and kiss-drunk, so I ask the question without a second thought. ‘Then why didn’t you?’
His mouth pulls up at the corner. ‘I’m pretty sure we both decided it was a bad idea.’
I swallow hard, but I don’t let him go, even if reality is pressing in again. ‘You’re right. We did.’
My stomach sinks an inch at a time. The end is already here. We’re about to pull away from each other and once again agree this was a heat-of-the-moment thing. That it meant nothing, even if we both know that’s a lie.
Except Dev’s hands don’t leave my face, and the flash in his eyes tells me he’s not going to lie about what’s happening.
‘If this is such a bad idea,’ he says, his voice tight, ‘then tell me why I want to kiss you again. Why I can’t get you out of my head. Why, every time I see you anywhere near another man, I want to drag him away from you and make sure he never comes close to you again. Tell me, Willow. Tell me why I feel that way.’
My throat constricts as he stares down at me. The burning passion in his gaze makes me want to push up onto my tiptoes and kiss him once more just to get him to close his eyes. He can’t look at me like that, or we’ll make choices that can’t be taken back.
Instead, all I can do is whisper, ‘I don’t know.’
He releases his hold on my face and lets out a heavy breath, dropping his head back before righting it again. But he doesn’t step away. He settles his hands on my waist, keeping me close. His message is clear. He’s not about to let me walk away.
And I don’t plan to go anywhere. I’m not ready to reach the end of this.
‘Then tell me howyoufeel,’ he urges, a faint note of desperation in his tone. ‘Tell me I’m not the only one going crazy.’
He must know how I feel. But maybe we both need to hear it again to believe it. ‘It’s not just you.’
He presses his forehead to mine and shakes his head just a little, like he can’t believe this is the situation we’ve found ourselves in, even though he’s the one who made the move – the one who once again changed everything for us. ‘Fuck, Willow.’
‘I know,’ I whisper, tightening my grip on him.
His jaw works as he takes in several steady breaths, his fingers pressing into my back. The pressure keeps me grounded at a time when I could easily float away.
‘I know this . . . this is a lot,’ he finally says. ‘But I don’t want you to decide later that this was a mistake. It wasn’t for me. And it wasn’t the last time either.’
I don’t regret calling it a mistake. It was the right thing to do, the right way to play things back then, but I can’t say the same now.
‘This isn’t a mistake.’ It’s the truth, but it’s not as simple as that. ‘But I don’t know what any of it means.’
We can let out all our long-held secrets, make all these confessions, but they don’t matter if we can’t figure out where and how things go from here.
Dev draws back enough to look in my eyes. ‘It means I don’t want to pretend it’s easy for me to stay away from you. I’m done acting like I don’t want to be near you every second I can.’ He sweeps my hair over my shoulder, fingers lingering on my nape. ‘I like you, Willow. So much that sometimes I forget what’s supposed to be keeping us apart.’
He might, but I can’t. My brother, this job, the risk of relationships and reputations ruined . . . There’s so much at stake. And yet that doesn’t stop me from saying, ‘I like you too. A lot.’
His smile turns teasingly smug, but I can practically feel the excitement thrumming under his skin at my admission. ‘Yeah, I kind of knew that. I mean, youdidalready drunkenly confess your feelings for me.’
I scoff to cover a laugh. ‘Shut up.’
The humour he’s brought to the moment makes some of my worries drift away. It’s like we’re ourselves once again. Dev and Willow, class clown and the girl trying not to laugh at all his jokes.
He twirls one of my curls around his finger, his grin back but his gaze still soft. ‘Nah, then I can’t tell you how much I wish I hadn’t let you walk away from me back then. I should have gone after you.’
I shake my head. ‘I wouldn’t have listened. I was too embarrassed.’
‘What about now?’ He searches every inch of my face. ‘Still too embarrassed?’
‘No. Not in the slightest.’
He’s leaning in again, and this time I’m ready for the kiss. So I close my eyes and tilt my head back, waiting for his lips to graze mine.
