Page 59 of On Fire Island
Urethra danced and sang around our table—as Pam jumped down Andie’s throat.
“What the hell, Andie, why did you do that?”
Josie looked thoroughly confused. She watched them fight like it was Wimbledon.
“I’m sorry—he had bingo!”
“Couldn’t you see he was barely hanging on?”
“Urethra said B fifty-two. He had B fifty-two. I shouted bingo. It was my natural competitive instinct.” She put her head in her hands. “For fuck’s sake, Pam, I’m sorry, but I told you it was too soon for him to come here.”
“It wouldn’t have been if you’d have used your head.”
Josie was clearly mortified, Urethra entertained.
“Should I go after him?” Andie asked.
“No. Let him walk it off. He’ll come back when he’s ready. Just try to think from now on.”
Urethra piped in like a Greek chorus, “You gotta think!”
“I should think? You’re the one who brought Josie over here and sat her down in Julia’s seat.”
“Think!” Urethra crooned before moving on.
“Am I sitting in someone’s seat?” Josie asked nervously.
“Ben’s wife Julia died of cancer just six weeks ago,” Pam said quietly. “We all had this tradition to come to Gay Bingo once a summer. That’s her seat... figuratively speaking.”
Josie bolted to her feet. They both reached out for her shoulders to coax her back down.
“It’s fine, Josie, I’m sorry. Obviously, this has nothing to do with you and,” she continued, turning to Andie, “I’m sorry, baby. I know you didn’t mean for this to happen.”
Andie nodded. “I’m sorry too.” She leaned in to kiss Pam sweetly on the lips. Pam smiled back lovingly.
“We really don’t know what to do for him. He’s a wreck, and we always feel like we’re doing or saying the wrong thing,” Pam explained to Josie.
“I’m sure you’re not. It takes time.”
We all sat in silence for a minute, a sullen and quiet table in a sea of gay.
“Do you want to order a drink?” Andie broke it and asked.
“I think I should go in case he comes back,” said Josie. “Besides, I’m still hungover from last night—I’m gonna grab some Tylenol at the store and head back to my friend’s place.”
Pam stood and hugged her goodbye. “Let’s not lose touch again,” Josie said.
“Definitely not, and follow me on social media—lots of pictures of our baby.”
“Follow me too—lots of pictures of cupcakes!”
“I will.”
Pam and Andie both raised their hands for more shots as I followed Josie out in search of Benjamin. I found him at Cherry Grove Sundries, a bright shop that’s part hardware store, part drugstore, and part rainbow emporium. Ben milled about, both embarrassed and curious. He waited until the store was empty and approached the guy at the register. A giant pump vat of lube sat on the counter like hand sanitizer.
“Do you have condoms?” he asked.
“Of course. What size?”
