I finally dozed off, only to be woken seconds later by a loud stampede of firefighters whooping and hollering and bursting through the storage closet door.
I should have expected them. Ididexpect them. But they scared the hell out of me anyway.
In response, I shouted and launched up into a jujitsu crouch on top of my mattress. The first face I saw was Case, who had been trundling toward me gleefully—but as soon as he saw me flip up into self-defense mode, he froze and put his hands up.
They all froze, actually.
I must have forgotten to mention I’d had a second job as a self-defense instructor.
In the still of that moment, as we all stared at each other, I got why they were there: Of course. They were hazing me.
I looked at their shocked faces. They’d clearly assumed it would be easier than this.
“Are you guys here to haze me?” I asked, lowering my arms.
Tiny gave a little shrug. “We’re supposed to duct-tape you to the basketball pole.”
I nodded and relaxed out of my crouch. Fair enough. “Okay, then.”
Tiny didn’t step forward, so I waved him toward me.
“Let’s get it over with,” I said.
He gave a little shrug and stepped closer, and I bent over his shoulder so he could carry me out the door, down through the engine bay, and out back to the parking lot.
Along the ride, I realized that they’d grabbed the rookie, too.
Next thing I knew, they had pressed us together, standing back to back against the basketball pole, running a roll of duct tape around us to keep us there. It was late summer and starting to get chilly. I’d been sleeping in a T-shirt and boy-shorts-style underwear. I felt glad in that moment that I always slept in my sports bra when I was on shift. I’d caught a glimpse of the rookie on the way down—and I felt pretty sure he wasn’t wearing much of anything at all.
Please, God,I thought.Don’t let him be naked.
We stood obediently as the crew duct-taped us from shoulders to hips, accepting our fate with as much dignity as possible, waiting for the guys to go back inside.
The guys knew their way around a roll of duct tape, I’ll give them that.
After they left, we were quiet for a good while. I could hear the rookie breathing. At one point, he coughed, and his elbow grazed mine.
“I’m spending a lot of time with this pole,” he said then.
“At least they didn’t turn the hose on us,” I said.
“That is lucky.”
“You knew they’d have to haze us.”
“Sure,” the rookie said. “Of course.”
“It’s part of the fun,” I said, starting to shiver.
“You bet,” he agreed.
“Rookie—” I started, but that was as far as I got.
“You can call me by my name, if you like.”
He hadn’t been on the crew list I’d studied. I didn’t remember his name. “I think I’ll stick with ‘rookie.’”
“Okay.”
