Page 12 of All the Beautiful Things
“He hid something important from me, something he knew I’d want to know, something I should have known. All of them did.”
I thought of that picture of Melissa and closed my eyes.
She’d been the first pure kindness to touch me outside Candace since Josh’s death. The first person I truly opened up to.
I wish you would have had a dad like mine.
And what sucked is for a few weeks, I did. Now?
Now what did I have?
I shuddered at the thought. Had it truly only been a few hours ago, I’d woken up next to Hudson, stretched out and thought of all the things I’d been thankful for?
“They didn’t just keep it from me, Angie. They hid it. Intentionally.”
That picture of Melissa. Had Hudson always hidden it when I came over? I’d surprised him last night but what about all the other nights and all the dinners at David’s. Or their offices. What pains did they go to in order to keep the truth of how they’d heard of me from me?
“It must have been important to leave you this upset,” Angie said. She draped one of her arms over my shoulders and pulled me to her. I went easily. Collapsed my head onto her shoulder and closed my eyes.
“It’s a really, really long story. I can’t even explain it all.”
“You don’t have to. I’m here for whatever you need.”
God. She was so good. Who was I to deserve such kindness? And hadn’t the Valentines just spent weeks, months teaching me I was worthy of it? Now everything was topsy-turvy. I gritted my teeth against the thoughts running rampant. If I was worthy of truth… why didn’t they give it?
“I don’t know what to do,” I admitted. “They gave me a job. A decent place to live, my first since…” My voice trailed off as I sucked in a breath and took a risk. “I went to prison when I was eighteen.”
Angie’s arm tightened around me. I never spoke of this to her. None of it. But one thing I was learning from David was that I’d served my penance. And I’d been innocent. “I got out not even a year ago. Do you know what that’s like? To go from a home and high school and then to prison and then freedom as an adult who’s old enough to now have all her shit figured out?”
“No one has their shit figured out. Hell, my mom is the best woman I know, and she still struggles.”
“I just thought I was getting there though, you know? That I was building this life I could finally be proud of and now it’s just…” I blew out a breath and sighed. “Gone.”
“Can it be fixed? You and Hudson? I’m sure there’s a reason he hid what he did, but I also think he likes you.” After a moment, she asked, “Did he do it to hurt you?”
Intentionally? No, he wasn’t evil. Did it matter? The result was the same.
“I don’t know if I can trust him again. I don’t know if I can trust any of them to be honest.”
And without honesty and trust… what in the hell did we have left?
4
Hudson
“Itold you!”
I could count on one hand the number of times I’d raised my voice to Dad and today covered all of them. “I told you, damn it. I told you this would blow up.”
Dad, wrecked and shaken with a pale hue to his coloring, looked as hurt as the pain slashing through me, the fear that started since that damn second I woke and found Lilly gone from bed. The pain that only increased when I saw her in my living room.
Staring at Melissa.
My sister and her savior and I knew…I fucking knew this would happen and she’d freak the hell out and shut us out before letting me explain. I predicted that moment I went through this morning before the first damn time I ever stepped through those doors of Judith’s which now felt like years and not weeks ago.
“Son—” Dad said and cleared his throat behind his fist. “We’ll fix it.”
“How?” I spun on his living room floor and threw my hands to my hips. I was still dressed in my pajamas.
