Page 84 of All the Ugly Things
On Josh and I’s birthdays, some of the few days of the year when my family would act like we all liked each other, our parents would take us to one of the ritziest restaurants in Chicago. We’d have dinner in a private room, walled off by glass, so every other customer could watch us, trying to figure out what made my family so important.
Lobster and a filet dinner.
I ordered it every time we went, loving the soft and sweet taste of lobster.
“It’s one of mine, too.”
“You didn’t have to go through all of this effort for me.”
It was bringing back too many memories, the few good ones I had. To hide them, I glanced down, placed the cloth napkin on my lap and took my time smoothing out wrinkles.
“You seem upset,” Hudson said.
I shook my head, still perfecting the already smoothed out napkin before setting my hands back to the table. “No. This is lovely and perfect and so much better than a loud restaurant. It’s just reminding me of things… people… who are hard to think of.”
Hudson reached over, placed his warm hand over mine. A delightful shiver traveled up my arm and straight to my chest. He gave me a quick squeeze and when I managed to lift my head to meet his gaze, there was no pity.
Compassion and understanding, but no pity.
I swallowed a heavy ball of emotions. “Thank you again, for this.”
“You can thank me by eating.” He pointed with the knife in his other hand toward my still untouched plate. “Before I eat yours for you.”
I chuckled and shook my head. He removed his hand from mine, and yet as soon as his touch was gone, so was the comfort it brought.
It made no sense, this attraction I had to Hudson and yet I’d learned long ago we didn’t always get what we wanted, or what made sense… or even what was honest and truthful.
Basking in the way he made me feel, I did as I was told.
“Where did you go to college?” I asked, trying to find any sort of normal conversation. His apartment didn’t give me any hints of the man he was although I knew enough.
He was good.
Too good for me, but that didn’t stop me from beginning to dream it wasn’t true.
“I went to the University of Iowa, in Iowa City.”
“Did you ever want to leave here? Go somewhere else further away?” I couldn’t wait for it. Growing up in Josh’s footsteps hadn’t always been easy. But he’d stayed so close to home for football, and until I killed him, his shadow was difficult to avoid or step out of.
I pushed away the thought and took a bite of my lobster.
Oh God. So good.It took effort not to let out a moan of pleasure as I bit into the succulent meal.
“Never. Two hours was far enough away from me. Besides, I had a scholarship and it made sense to go.”
“Academics or sports?”
“Baseball.” He grinned, that smile of a man who’d been a boy with the world at his fingertips.
“I guessed that,” I admitted, and quickly glanced down at my plate.Way to go, Lilly. Now you sound a lovestruck fool.
“You did?”
“Yes. The first time you came into the diner, I assumed you were an athlete.”
“Because of my stunning physique?” Hudson sat up straight in his chair, puffing out his chest, smirking at me with that twisted grin I was beginning to like so much.
Stunning physique, indeed.
