Page 41 of All the Ugly Things
She didn’t ask to help me again, just moved behind me and pushed her hands to my armpits, lifting me to my feet.
My knees buckled and I cried out in pain. My knees stung, my side was worse. I wrapped an arm around my waist and hugged myself as if that’d help but it did little.
Once I was steadier, she slowly guided me toward the door to our building.
“Thank you,” I finally said on a ragged exhale.
“Us girls have to stick together. I’ll get you to your place and call the police.”
“No.” I shook my head. “No cops. I’ll be more careful.”
“Man like that on the loose—”
She didn’t know who it was. I should have told her. Chances are Manny might have seen her but if I did that, then she would definitely call the cops.
They’d show up, take my statement, and then that statement would get conveniently lost in a pile of mess once they saw my name and who I was, what I’d done.
And hell… if Ellen heard about this.
“Please, Samaya. I just want to clean up.”
“Okay, Lilly.” I knew Samaya more than just in passing. There were days this last summer when she was outside with her girls. We spent some time together and a couple times when her other sitter wasn’t available, I’d watched them for her. Cute, six-year-old twin girls who reminded me of everything I’d probably never have. They were energetic and crazy smart. I cooked them mac ‘n’ cheese and vegetables and they’d thanked me as if I served them a seven-course meal.
She took some of my weight and helped me up the stairs, gathering my purse she spotted on the stairway. “I was headed to bed and heard a scream. Good thing I stayed up late with Yasmine who had a bad dream or I wouldn’t have heard.”
“Yeah. Good thing.” I grunted with every step, the stabbing pain in my side increasing and throbbing.
I should have let Hudson bring me home. He would have walked me to my door, made sure I got in safe. He seemed gentlemanly enough to do something like that.
At my door, I took my purse from Samaya and found my key ring.
“Thanks again, Samaya. I appreciate your help.”
She eyed me with the look of a mom who cared about her kids. Foreign to me with my own but I’d seen it from moms inside. It was a look telling me I was stupid, but thankful I was okay.
“‘Night, Lilly. Come get me if you need help. Figure I won’t be sleeping for a while now.”
“Yeah.” I huffed a dry laugh that made me cough. Pain shot from my side to my head. “Me either.”
As soon as I was behind the door, I shoved my chair in front, and then another one.
You’re safe. You’re fine. Everything’s going to be fine, you just have to survive one night at a time.
I went to the small bathroom area that was so small I could barely spin in a circle. My hands shook so bad it took three tries to get the water on, two to grab the towel from the hook. I went to work quickly, skipping over my cuts and scrapes while I grabbed tweezers to try to remove slivers of mulch from my cheeks and chin.
It wasn’t until I washed my face, patched up the blood and curled into bed I realized I’d dropped the cupcakes.
I rolled over, hugged my pillow, and cried.
Nothing good lasted long enough, not for me, and I needed to remember that.
A soft knock hit my door, making me jump. I gave it a few moments to see if whoever was there would go away, but the knocking continued… quiet and patient, and not at all terrifying loud like Manny had some mission to complete.
I flung my pillow to the floor and curled up, careful of my side. The blood on my face had dried and my lip still pulsed.
I reached the door, shuffling slowly on sock-covered feet and peeped out.
It was Samaya, holding a small wicker basket in her arms.
