Page 73 of Crave Me
“Don’t know. Finish up my time with him, deal with my heartbreak and move on like most people do.”
“Is there any way to make it work? Can you talk to your family and explain things?”
“I don’t imagine walking into my parents and saying, ‘Hey, I know Cassie hated being tied up and spanked, but I think it’s glorious so you don’t mind if Simon comes over for dinner, do you?’ would go over too well.”
Haley had the grace to blush. She poked at her salad and frowned. “Yeah, that probably sucks.”
“I don’t know,” Gabby interjected. The hope in her voice hurt almost as much as the pain I was feeling. “It’s been years since then right?” At my nod, she shrugged. “You’re an adult, Chloe. They don’t have to like it, although I’m sure with time they’d manage to deal with it.”
I tore off a chunk of bread and shoved it into my mouth. I didn’t feel hungry but I still needed food. “Yeah, I’ve considered that. We’ll see what happens, I guess.”
A heavy, almost mournful silence thickened the air, and Gabby finally broke it by sharing Luminous was having an open visitors’ night on New Year’s Eve. Dylan was planning on having live demonstrations in the social meeting room and closing off the playrooms completely. He wanted to open the doors to people curious about the lifestyle but who maybe had been too nervous to explore it. He figured News Year’s Eve, New Year resolutions and goals, would be just the push people needed. He was looking for experienced couples to provide the demonstrations, where there would be different rules, including no full nudity in order to entice the guests.
Each member was allowed to invite two friends, and my mind immediately went to anyone who’d be interested.
I came up blank, but it didn’t mean I wasn’t excited about the possibility of the night. Or the upcoming year.
Perhaps I would have a new Dom who would want to demonstrate with me.
The idea wasn’t nearly as exciting as it would have been a few weeks ago.
* * *
Gabby pulled into Simon’s driveway and grinned at me. “You remember your instructions?”
Like always, Simon had been constantly on mind, but I’d completely forgotten his instructions.
“Damn. No, I haven’t.”
“You better think quick,” she said. “What does he have?”
I described all the implements but there was one that made her smile the most. “Sex swing. Choose it. He has to be gentle with you, can’t whip you. It’s more intimate than the others.”
“I’m not sure I can handle the intimacy anymore.”
I grabbed the handle and opened the door.
“You guys will figure it out. If it’s any consolation, Chloe, I’ve known Simon a long time. I’m guessing he joined Luminous a few years ago right after the thing with Cassie. I was mostly quiet today at lunch while you were talking because I’ve heard all about it. But with you, he’s different. And it’s a good different, so don’t give up what you want too easily.”
I slid out of the chair. I appreciated the hope but getting my hopes up too high risked them shattering at my feet in a few weeks. “Thanks, Gabby. And thanks for lunch.”
“My advice?” she said. “Be honest with him. He deserves it—not only as your Dom, but as the man you love. You hide that from him and it could make things worse. He can’t care for you like he’s supposed to if he doesn’t know what you’re feeling.”
“And if he doesn’t return them?”
She gave me a sad smile. “Then you know where you stand, and can move on to something better. But I don’t think you have anything to worry about.”
I thanked her again and said my goodbyes. She waited in the driveway until I’d opened the door and waved her off.
As I shut the door behind me, I stared at the living room and tried to gain control of my breathing.
The room wasn’t quiet. In the gas fireplace, a fire had been lit, warming the large room and from the kitchen, soft music was playing. It was romantic and comfortable and did the opposite of settling me.
But I’d been given a command, and I intended to obey.
Knowing he was waiting for me, I concentrated on the task at hand, mostly, pleasing Simon.
I dropped my clutch on a table near an oversized chair that matched the couch and returned to the spot Simon had told me to be naked. I pulled off my boots, setting them up nicely and pushed down my underwear. The cotton abraded my sore ass and thighs as the underwear fell to my feet. I kicked them off and removed my dress and bra before I lost my nerve. Once I was naked, I took the time to fold and stack everything near my purse and sank to my knees.
