Page 37 of Don't Lie to Me
I shook my head. Realizing that Jack truly cared about me was shocking enough on its own accord. I tried to bury my head into his chest to feel safe again because him just asking that question reminded me of all the things I wanted to forget. I didn’t want to talk about this now. Actually I didn’t want to talk about it ever, but I knew I was going to have to.
The hand that was holding my hair cupped my cheek and pulled me back so I had to look directly at him. “Does Marcus know about Logan?”
My eyes widened in shock. My entire body felt like it was being shocked a thousand lightning bolts and my stomach flip-flopped making me feel nauseous.
“What? How did you know?” I asked breathlessly.
Jack frowned. “It took me awhile. I talked to him over dinner and watched him, trying to figure out why he would upset you so much. The entire time thinking he looked so vaguely familiar. After dinner, Martin said something about you working for me and he did this little twitching thing with his nose. It reminded me exactly of what Logan does when we play video games. He’s Logan’s dad, isn’t he?”
I let out the deepest breath I have ever breathed in my entire life. It wasn’t out of relief, either. I removed my arms from around Jack and wiggled out of his arms and off his lap. My body felt all sorts of itchy as I began pacing my room, knowing I was going to have to explain this.
I took another swig from the wine bottle and forcefully set it back down on the table. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand.
“Fuck…you need to start talking because my mind is spinning in a thousand directions and all I want to do is go kick Marcus’s ass right now for putting this look of fear on you.”
When I turned to him, he had his elbows resting on his knees but he looked anything but relaxed. His hands were tightened into fists and I could feel the anger rolling off him. I had no doubt he meant every word; consequences be damned.
I ran a shaking hand through my long hair. “Yes, Marcus is Logan’s dad. And no – neither of them know.”
I felt like I should feel relieved. In all the years I worked for Jack the subject of Logan’s dad came up periodically, but all I ever told Jack was that his dad left when I was pregnant. Which was true obviously, but there was so much more to the story and now it was all going to come out. I wanted to feel the weight lifted off my shoulders from hiding something from him, but instead the weight just felt like it was crushing my chest making it hard to breathe.
Jack hissed in a deep breath, his already stressed eyes flashing in anger.
“There’s more,” I said and sat down on a chair across from Jack, putting as much distant in between us as possible. I rubbed my hands together to make them stop trembling like I had just chugged a pot of coffee but it was no use. I nervously ran my fingers through my hair, before forcing my hands to settle in my lap. Jack’s eyes never left mine. He sat there, just watching me – waiting for me to tell him the story.
“Marcus and I dated for two years before I got pregnant. When I finally told him, he asked me to marry him.”
Jack’s head collapsed into his hands and he rubbed his hair roughly, making it look even more crazy. He muttered an entire string of obscenities so vile it would make a sailor blush. He looked at me, finally, with his lips pursed into a straight white line. “Did you love him?”
I nodded hesitantly.
“Do you still….love him?” He choked out the question as if it brought him physical pain. Hearing the question made me want to throw up all over again.
“God no! Marcus must have told his dad about us, because the night we were supposed to leave for Vegas, Senator Whitmore showed up at my apartment that I shared with Macy at the time. He handed me an envelope filled with cash.” I looked away and felt the tears burning the back of my eyes at the memory of the Senator’s icy black eyes. He looked at me like I was nothing more than the dirt on the bottom of his shoe and treated me so much worse. “He paid me twenty-five thousand dollars to get an abortion and told me Marcus didn’t want to see me anymore.”
“Holy fuck. You’re kidding me.” I thought Jack’s head might explode from the news.
I shook my head. “I’m not. I didn’t do it obviously…..but it wrecked me for a long time, that he just walked away when he promised me so much.” I looked at Jack’s eyes and wondered what he would think of me for the next part. “I kept the money. For a while I thought of burning it, or returning it. But I was so angry that I decided to say ‘screw ‘em.’ They could afford it and I needed it. I got so sick with morning sickness that I could barely go to school and eventually I dropped out. That was when Macy finally talked to you about me.”
“That was a lot of money – you didn’t need to come work for me then. Why did you?”
“I put the money in an account and refused to touch it unless it was an emergency. I figured it would at least pay for Logan’s school down the road or something, but there wasn’t any way in hell I was going to use their money for me.”
We sat there quietly for several minutes not saying anything, but my mind was spinning from finally telling Jack about Marcus, and wondering what he thought of me.
Jack finally spoke first. “That explains a lot. Actually.”
“What do you mean?”
He shook his head like he was trying to clear it of something. “Marcus isn’t close to his dad anymore. He said he has nothing to do with him and hasn’t spoken to him in years. It just makes me wonder if it’s all connected.”
“But you said you wanted his connection to politics – last week, when you told me about the new lawyer you brought on.”
He nodded and smiled lightly. “I do….but Marcus has made a name for himself on his own merit. I don’t need the connection to the Senator, necessarily. The name on its own is powerful enough.” He stared at me with hauntingly dark eyes and I knew he was angry all over again. “And I wouldn’t want to be connected to him now after hearing all that shit. Jesus, Emma – he treated you like ---“
“I know,” I snapped. I didn’t want to hear the word whore or trash or whatever vile thing he was going to say. “Will this change anything about Marcus working for you?”
He closed his eyes tightly and when he opened them again, his professional mask of indifference was in place. “You let me worry about Marcus. And let me worry about taking care of you. I won’t let them hurt you again….as long as you promise me you don’t have feelings for Marcus anymore.”
