Page 72 of Vardaesia
Reaching her free hand forward to grab hold of Alex while her other kept pressure against their joined swords, Zaylin leaned in and said, “I know that Gate was hard on you, Alex—I know. But you have to move past it, because you’re stronger than this.” Her silver eyes held Alex’s as she whispered, “Don’t doubt in darkness what you believed in times of light.”
Alex closed her eyes as the words washed over her, flooding the aching emptiness of her bleeding heart.
“You arestrongerthan this, Alex,” Zaylin repeated, giving her a rough shake, and Alex knew she didn’t just mean physically. “So get over what happened with the Gate, move on from the false accusations you faced, and show me what you’re really capable of.” Releasing her, Zaylin finished, “Now, stand up andfight me properly.”
Zaylin was right—Alexhadgiven up. After what she had endured in the Gate, after what she had endured formonths, she had lost the strength, the will, to keep fighting. Not just physically, but with every part of her. She was tired—so incredibly tired. And she wasn’t sure if she could take anymore.
‘We’re all going to die because of you.’
The words Kaiden had thrown at her echoed in her mind, her fear of them coming true bringing a metallic taste to her mouth. She knew it hadn’t really been him, that he would never say anything like that to her, but that didn’t ease her terror that he would be proved correct.
Everything that had happened in the Gate might have been fake, but it had stillfeltreal, since the accusations hurled at her had come from deep within Alex’s own subconscious. The blame, the condemnation… all of it was what she lived with, day in, day out. Hearing the words come from those she loved wasn’t an indication of whattheybelieved—it was of whatshebelieved.
The Gate of Judgement hadn’t been about her facing the judgement of others.
It had been about Alex judgingherself.
Just as she had been for too long.
Her guilt of the past, her fear of the future, it was crippling, enough that part of herdidwant to give up, just as Zaylin had accused.
But Zaylin had also said more than that.
‘Don’t doubt in darkness what you believed in times of light.’
Everything Alex had done up until this moment was with the belief that she stood a chance. That the mortals of Medora stood a chance. And as she stared at the Tia Auran’s fierce gaze, she realised that she’d be damned if she was going to lose sight of that. Hope was all she had left, but it was enough. Because in a future filled with uncertainty, hope was everything.
Her past might have been shadowed by guilt and shame, but it didn’t define her. It never had. She had fallen and she had failed, but she had never given up—and she wasn’t going to now.
Aven had chosen his path, just as Alex had chosen hers.
Now she just had to keep fighting for it.
… Starting with Zaylin.
Steely resolve swept over Alex as she rose to her feet and straightened her spine.
Seeing the determination in her eyes, Zaylin’s lips stretched into an eager smile. And when she lunged again, it was she who staggered backwards at the force of Alex’s intercept.
And again, a second time.
When a third lunge left Zaylin open for Alex to retaliate with her own sequence of attacks, the Tia Auran scrambled to defend herself, backing up across the dais as her golden blade met A’enara’s fiery length over and over.
Soon enough, Zaylin began cheating,parroningwith blinding flashes in between surprise attacks. But Alex had fought Shadow Walkers with similar fighting techniques, and she was undaunted by the immortal’s supernatural display. If anything, it gave her the upper hand, since Zaylin had clearly been expecting her moves to be disorienting. That left her vulnerable when Alex jumped forward with immortal speed the next time sheparroned, grasping hold of the Tia Auran and flash-transporting with her, just as she had once done withTrell during theirvatali targomatch in Graevale. Alex then took advantage of Zaylin’s shock to kick out her legs and slam her to the ground, pointing A’enara at her throat, its blue flames barely a whisper away from searing her skin.
Panting underneath her, Zaylin’s ebony face stretched into a smug grin despite the fact that she had lost. “Ready to thank me now?”
Knowing the Tia Auran had returned full circle to her initial warning upon instigating their fight, Alex sent her a rueful smile and offered her a hand, hoisting her back up to her feet.
“I don’t usually thank people who try to kill me,” Alex said as she pressed her fingers to the cut on her neck, smearing the blood that dribbled down past her collar.
“You needed to get that out of your system,” Zaylin replied unapologetically, dusting off her leathery black outfit. “But more importantly, you needed to surrender your doubt, shame and guilt once and for all. It’s the only way you’ll have the strength to face all that is to come.”
More grateful than she could say, Alex had to resist the urge to throw her arms around the other woman, certain the act wouldn’t be received well, nor would any gushing words of appreciation. Instead, she cleared her throat and said, “No offence, but I kind of presumed your race would be better at fighting. I mean, you’re great and all, but you seem to be on a similar level to the Meyarins.”
“Our fighting skills are equal to theirs, depending on how much training we have undergone,” Zaylin said, sheathing her golden sword. “And as I’ve already told you, it has been many ages since my people have had to be battle-ready. Our skills are… sloppy.”
Alex removed her hand from her neck and wiggled her bloodied fingers. “You don’t seem sloppy.”
