Page 55 of Not Your Romeo
Time was slipping by so much faster than it used to. I couldn’t remember the last week of peace I’d found. I sat there straining to recall the last meal I’d enjoyed with all of my children around a table. It didn’t happen often now that their mother and I had separate houses and they were grown. I didn’t hold it against anyone, with all of them grown now, it was hard to get everyone’s schedule lined up with a big family. Still, I kind of wished I’d made the time before Sammy rode off with Menace.
Some folks say every little thing happens for a reason, that life is all some predestined plan. I could see the want in believing a notion like that. Honestly, I could, but I was also a man who knew damned good and well; there was a whole lot of shit that I’d done in my lifetime that no God known or yet to come would ever sanction, let alone have planned. I was a man who had known war as a marine and a biker. An individual who had buried a child before they had lost their first tooth. It was safe to say, I’d never been much of a believer in all of that pre-destiny bullshit.So, I kind of surprised myself, when I started praying before I even realized I was doing it. I’m not saying I was any good at it, and I don’t know what might have started it.
I’m just saying– I don’t know why you put this girl in my life. I didn’t ask for no woman. I wasn’t looking for one. Hell, I didn’t plan on ever being married again, let alone to a young lady with her whole life ahead of her. She should be at college parties, not laying in a hospital bed over street vengeance. You know, I really hope that’s why you brought her to me, because if it ain’t, you’re just gonna have to add what I’m about to do to the ten-mile list of mortal sins I’m gonna be sweating off.
I snorted, and it was not lost on me that maybe that was some kind of sanction in its own right? Or maybe I was just losing my mind from lack of sleep and looking for signs in all the wrong places. What even was this? I didn’t go to church…
But what if it made her better?
I sucked my teeth and fell back into my prayer like we were old friends.
Listen, right or wrong, I have to keep her safe. That’s why you gave her to me, right? Yeah, we’ll go with that. So, if you don’t want this war, you better send a sign the size of a Greyhound or something. You of all people know I only know how to do this one way. You blessed me with nerves of steel, a heart that beats and bleeds for my club and family, and a kill-switch that lets me get shit done when either are in need of my skills. Once I pull that switch, we both know what happens. I get lost in the war, I sign on for more and more. I lose the ability to trust anyone’s protection or survival to chance. My trigger finger has no conscience in such states. So, if you mean for this girl to have any type of normal, you need to let me know. Like, now! I really, really ain’t trying to make her into Jolene. She deserves so much more. You’re gonna have to show me something, help me out here–
“Sir, are you alright?” a gentle voice interrupted.
My head snapped up and I blinked, quickly fixing a smile on my face, “Yeah. I’m good. You can save the Narcan.”
Her smile fell and she hurried toward her vehicle, leaving me to laugh as I hauled myself off the bench and headed inside.
“Get it together, Ziggy,” I pep-talked myself on the elevator ride up.
The nurse smiled when she spotted me and pointed toward the door, “She’s asking for you. I’ll be in momentarily.”
“Thanks.” I didn’t slow my pace a bit, I wanted to see her alert and talking.
She was moaning and two staff members were helping as she positioned herself with the head of the bed elevated.
“Your neck,” she gasped, when she saw me.
Tears instantly filled her eyes, as my hand shot up to my bandaged neck.
“Oh, shit.” I held out my hand in what I hoped was a reassuring gesture and stepped toward the napkin dispenser. It was shiny enough I could see where the tape began.
“Sauce said to take it off, but I forgot how long he said.”
“What happened?” Her voice still sounded scared, and her expression was full of concern.
The staff hurried out of the room as I peeled off the remainder of the gauze mess and tossed it in a waste basket.
Her lips slowly shifted into a smile once she was able to see the tattoo. It was a beautiful rose with our wedding date tattooed above it.
“You did that for me?” She blinked back tears, but they fell anyway.
“Roisin. Little rose is what it means, yeah?”
Her smile met her eyes, “I want us to go home.”
“We will, love. As soon as you’re better.” I took her hand in mine and kissed her knuckles.
Her gaze shifted from me, and I turned to see what caught her attention. The nurse in blue scrubs was approaching, along with a doctor in the hallway. She raised her hand to knock on the door frame, but when she realized we were expecting them, she waved instead.
“Hey, guys, this is Dr. Franklin. Doctor, this is our patient, Roisin Nash and her husband Mr. Nash.”
The doctor closed the door behind him and I gripped Ro’s hand a little tighter, without meaning to.
“Ah–” she hissed.
“Sorry,” I whispered, but I wasn’t sure she heard me considering how loud the doctor’s next words were.
