Page 78 of Chase

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Page 78 of Chase

Chase squeezes my thigh gently, reminding me that he’s there.

“I owe you all an apology and an explanation,” I say trying to clear my throat to make it seem like I’m a little less nervous than I am.

“It’s okay. We understand. You can tell us when you’re ready,” Ally tells me. I love how reassuring she is. It’s what she does, when she isn’t giving the boys shit or putting them in their place.

I glance at Rhys and he nods slightly, giving me the encouragement I need to continue.

“I’d like to explain now. You deserve to know, and I don’t want to keep this from you guys. It’s hard to talk about. But I know you aren’t going to treat me any differently when you find out.” I look around the table and meet all their gazes briefly. I have all their attention and this makes me even more nervous.

I need to do this.

Chase threads his fingers with mine and squeezes. His thumb rubs small circles on my hand. His touch grounds me and encourages me to continue.

“As you know, my mum was an alcoholic with a drug problem.” I pause and everyone nods.

“Well when she died five years ago, she was in debt with the local dealer. Apparently, they had made an agreement that when I turned eighteen, I’d be his to do with what he liked. He could keep me, sell me, pimp me out. Whatever he felt like.”

“Fuck,” Arden whispers.

Chase squeezes my hand harder, encouraging me to continue. I can feel his anger start to bubble. He isn’t angry at me. I know that. He’s angry at my mum.

“We didn’t know that. Not long after I turned eighteen, I was kidnapped. I wouldn’t comply so they beat me and starved me to make me comply.” I shudder remembering what it was like to be locked in the dingy, smelly room. I’ll have the scars forever.

“How long did it take for you to be found?” Arden asks.

I look around the room. Ally and Millie have tears in their eyes. Rhys is rubbing Ally’s back in the same calming way that Chase is for me.

Chase and Arden both look like they would kill for me.

“It took five days. Millie was the first to realise I was gone. Her and Smalls went to the station to tell Dad when they couldn’t find me.” I stop, the memories crashing into me all over again.

“Dad told them it was fine. Maybe I’d just gone to stay with a friend and had forgotten to tell someone. Both Millie and Smalls knew that I’d never do that. They knew something was wrong, but Dad wouldn’t believe them. He had no idea I had no friends.”

“Asshole,” Chase curses. I look into his eyes and see the turmoil in them. He feels this as much as I do. He’s angry. And rightfully so. This was the straw that broke the camel’s back so to speak. I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to forgive Dad for not taking the whole situation more serious.

“Three days later, Smalls asked his foster mum to report me as missing, because they’d more likely take her seriously. She went to the Sargent, who opened an investigation. Dad was benched because they suspected that maybe it was someone he’d arrested out for revenge. It wasn’t until my kidnappers realised I wouldn’t comply that they decided to send a ransom request instead. It took the police twenty-four hours to find me after that. I was bloody and bruised, dehydrated and starving but okay considering. It could’ve been worse. For the most part, I’m okay, but as you’ve all seen, I can freak out and I get jumpy in crowds,” I rush to get that last of it out.

“They threatened me while I was there, told me they knew I had a sister. They said they’d come for her. The police arrested the two guys, but it was a bigger operation. They couldn’t be sure that someone wouldn’t try again. That’s when Dad decided to move us back here. I already planned on going to NHU next year, so it kind of made sense.”

“But your dad didn’t change afterwards did he?” Chase asks even though he knows the answer.

“No, I think he blames himself. He threw himself into work as much as he could and then well, you know what he’s been like since we moved here. It’s only been this last week that he’s been home. I’m still worried that he may fall back on old ways when I leave.” I let the tears stain my cheeks.

I’m not afraid to show my emotions in front of these people. I don’t want there to be secrets.

When I’m with them I feel like I’m home.

“Unbelievable,” Chase says shaking his head at the same time Millie speaks.

“You don’t have to worry about me next year.” She wipes her tears and straightens her back.

“I know you can look after yourself Mill, but you deserve to have someone here when you’re home.”

“I know. But...” She hesitates. Out of the corner of my eye I see Chase nod at her. Almost as if he’s encouraging her. What’s going on?

“I was going to wait to ask you. But Nat spoke to me during the week. She asked if I’d like to move in with her next year. She’s already spoken to Dad, and he’s agreed if it’s what I want. She’s spoken to the hospital, and they are happy to move her to mostly days and GW will be there when she’s not,” Millie tells me.

“You’re okay with this?” I ask Chase. I love Mumma Nat for offering this. I’d feel better knowing Millie was there.