Chase:I miss you
I don’t reply. I don’t know what to say to them. The tears continue to flow. I was mean to them. I don’t deserve their kindness.
Pulling the cover over my head I start up my kindle and read, knowing already that tonight I’m not going to get much sleep.
***
Early in the morning, Millie comes into my room and crawls into bed with me. Daisy isn’t far behind her. Chase must have dropped Daisy off.
I haven’t slept. Instead, I’m halfway through my second book.
“I’m sorry,” she whispers. Her voice is more sympathetic today. I wonder if now that she has had time to think that she really does understand how much her actions affected not only me but everyone else around.
“What happened yesterday?” I ask. I really hope she’ll tell me the truth this time.
“I was stupid. I didn’t think.” She starts fidgeting with the edge of the blanket.
“Who were you with?”
“Hayden,” she says hiding her head in the pillow.
“Hayden? As in Rhys’ brother?” I ask curiously. I know they’ve hung out a few times with all of us when Rhys had to babysit. But I didn’t realise it was something they were doing outside of the group.
“Yeah,” she says.
“Do you like him?” Obviously, that would be the only explanation for her to be hanging out with him one on one.
“Yes... No... Maybe... I don’t know. I like spending time with him.”
From what I’ve heard, I know Hayden is trouble.
“I don’t like the idea of you being alone with him. I’m not saying you can’t hang out with him. I just want other people to be there. I know Hayden is a bit of a bad boy. You don’t need to be mixed up in that.” I can’t tell her who she can and can’t hang out with. I refuse to be that person and I know that even if he is trouble, he’s Rhys’ brother.
“Okay. But Dad grounded me last night, so you don’t have to worry.”
“He did what?” I ask, unable to keep the shock out of my voice.
“He grounded me for the rest of the school year. School and soccer are the only reasons I’m allowed to leave the house unless I’m with you or him.” She says sitting up to pat Daisy.
“Wow, does he plan on monitoring this?” I ask. Because there is no way I’m doing it. It’s only three weeks until the end of the school year, so the punishment isn’t that harsh. But I still don’t want to be the one to enforce it.
I don’t even know how I feel about being here again. Dad still has a lot of making up to do.
“Yeah, he said he has swapped his shifts. He’ll be home by dinner most nights.”
“Wow.” I don’t know what else to say. I’ve been pushing him for this for years.
“Yep. I don’t know how I feel. He’s never been here,” Millie says her voice breaking.
I sit up and pull her in for a hug.
“It’s okay Mills, this is a good thing. You deserve to have him play an active part in your life. You may be old enough to look after yourself but having Dad to lean on will be a good thing.”
“What about you? You missed out on having that.”
“I know I did, but I’m okay. I’ll be okay. Dad and I may repair or relationship over time, but for now I’ll stay here with you so that you have that chance. I leave next year, but I need to know that you and Dad will be okay. That you won’t be left alone.”
“I’m sorry you had to grow up so quick just to look after me,” she sobs.
