Page 21 of Chase
“I haven’t seen those girls in years.” Years??? What the hell is he talking about? I’m confused.
“Fourteen years. It’s been fourteen years.”
“What’s going on? I have no idea how either of you know them?” I say a little frustrated. I look back and forward from mum and GW waiting for one of them to clue me in.
Wait. I replay the conversation I had with her yesterday. She said Ms Turner was her grandmother, but said that she didn’t really know her.
“I looked after Yasmin and then Millie when she came along. You and Yasmin were inseparable.” Mum looks off into the kitchen and then back to me, she gives me a small sad smile before she continues. “Their dad David was your father’s partner. When Yasmin was born, everything was okay for the first week. Then one night David got called home by a neighbour. Yasmin had been screaming for hours. Debbie had gone off on a bender and left her at home alone.”
I watch Mum as she speaks, not completely understanding what she’s telling me.
“David didn’t know what to do, so he asked if I’d babysit. I was pregnant with you and wasn’t working so I didn’t mind. We thought it’d only be temporary. Because when Debbie finally came home, David checked her into rehab.” Yasmin told us that her mum had died, but never went into detail, I wonder if it was an overdose? I wait for Mum to continue speaking. GW has put down the paper and is listening.
“Rehab didn’t work. She got out and fell back into old habits, so I looked after Yasmin pretty much fulltime. Your dad and David were trying to work their way up, so they took as many shifts as they could, which left me at home with two babies once you came along.” Mum wipes away a tear. I can tell this is painful for her. I don’t know why she hadn’t told me about all this before.
“You did a fantastic job Natalie,” GW says as he gives her hand a slight squeeze. Encouraging her to continue.
“Only because I had you to help.” Mum says to GW and offers him a small smile before continuing. “For three years, I raised you and Yasmin with GW’s help. Neither your father of David were much help. It got to the point that David just left Yasmin here and occasionally came to visit. Your father started spending more and more time at David’s so he could sleep without being disturbed.” More tears stain Mum’s cheek and she no longer wipes them away. I reach out and hold her hand. I don’t know what else to do to comfort her at the moment.
“I’m sorry Mum.” I offer her an apology. I’m sorry for what she went through.
“You have nothing to apologise for. You children were innocent in all of this.” She tells me reassuringly.
“What happened? Why did they leave?” I ask. I need to know what happened. I knew when I first laid eyes on Yasmin that there was some familiarity there. That part of me knew her. I just couldn’t figure out how or what.
“Debbie and David were on again, off again until she got pregnant with Millie. She stuck around during the pregnancy but the day she had her, she checked out of hospital and disappeared again. We were use to her disappearing for days or even weeks at a time. David brought Millie around and then that was it. I had two three year-olds and a newborn. GW moved in to help because your father chose that week to officially move out.”
What? Mum and Dad separated? How did I not know that? Mum would just tell me that Dad was at work.
“You and Dad separated?” I ask shocked that I didn’t know.
“Yeah, I chose not to tell you. I wanted to wait until you were older and would understand. He was never here anyway and while Yasmin was around, nothing else mattered to you. It was sweet watching you together. She’d wake up screaming at night and wouldn’t stop until I put you in the bed with her. You were the only person able to calm her down.”
I think back to earlier in the week. I think I might still be that person. Just neither of us knew it.
“You, Yasmin and Millie were all that mattered. I had known your father and I were over for months. Neither of us wanted to admit it.”
“Then what happened? Why did they leave?” I wait for Mum to finish telling me the story. I have a feeling I know what’s coming, but I need her to confirm. A few years back, GW finally caved and told me how Dad really died. Mum would always just tell me it was on the job.
“Just before you turned four, your father died. He and David were called to a disturbance at a local drug dealer’s house. Debbie was there. Things happened and your father was shot. Died almost immediately. Debbie was sentenced to six months in rehab and David chose to have her do it up North. He decided a change of scenery might help. He showed up one night, put the girls in the car, and I never saw them again.” Mum starts sobbing and GW gets up to comfort her.
“Why didn’t you stop him? Did you try to contact him?” I’m angry and I know at the moment it’s misplaced. It’s not Mum’s fault.
“He was their father, I didn’t have any rights to the girls. I tried to call him for weeks, he never answered. Eventually he changed his number and that was it. I didn’t even know where they moved to. I tried to find them.”
I look around the room with new eyes, trying to remember something about Yasmin, anything. We’ve lived in this house my entire life. Looking around at the pictures on the walls, I voice my thoughts. “Is that why there are no pictures of me as a baby?” I remember Ally asking Mum when we were younger and for the life of me, I can’t remember what excuse Mum gave.
Mum nods her head and wipes her eyes. “Yes, it was to hard to look at all the reminders. You were devastated when ‘Your Yasmin’ was gone. It wasn’t until you met Arden and Ally that I got to see you happy again.”
“Why don’t I remember them?” I knew when I first saw Yasmin that she was familiar, and I was drawn to her in a way that I couldn’t explain.
“It’s called childhood amnesia. I had taken all the photos down as suggested by the child psychologist, she thought it would benefit you more if you weren’t constantly reminded of the person you were missing. Especially because I thought we would never see them again. Over time, you stopped asking about Yasmin.”
“Do you still have the pictures?” I ask.
Mum nods and gets up to leave the room. “I’ll get them.” Her voice is quiet and sad.
“Losing those girls devastated your mother. More than your father leaving did,” GW says and I look up at him. I’d forgotten he was here.
