Great. Dinner with my mom and Sam. That duo thrives on the toxicity they emit. They are made for each other. “Are Cameron and Will going to be there?”Please say no.Just another person to make awkward small talk with. I haven’t seen my sister in months. I’d rather it just be me, Sam, and my mom and those two can talk all night while I nod along with their discussion, pretending like everything in life is going swimmingly.
“Yes. I invited them over as well.”
Wonderful. “It’ll be a full house then,” I say, with as much pep in my step as I can muster.
“Well, it would be if they’d give me a grandchild already.” I can practically hear her eyes roll through the phone.
“Mom, you know they’re trying.” Cameron and Will have been trying to have a kid for a few years now. It’s not been going well. I can’t exactly relate as I sure as hell am not ready to have kids yet. I would love to have kids someday, butnotwith Sam. I refuse to bring kids into this relationship. Lord only knows if he would continue the same behavior with them. I shake the thought from my head.
“I know. I’m just excited,” she squeaks through the phone.
“Mmhm. Well, I have to go. I guess we will see you tonight.”
“See you tonight.” Her voice trails off as she hangs up the phone almost before finishing her reply.
“Love you, too,” I mumble as I slip my phone back into my pocket.
Family dinners used to be so much fun when Dad was still around. But now, it’s hard to imagine a family dinner without any drama. I remember when Mom wasn’t so hard to be around. She’s not the mother she used to be. When Dad died, she turned into a completely different person. Losing a husband would change anyone at the core. I don’t necessarily blame her, but she and I rarely see eye-to-eye anymore.
***
As Sam and I pull intothe driveway of my childhood home, the once bright blue door looks dull and sad. The dead Christmas wreath still hangs on the hook, practically screaming for a reason to start a house fire. The welcome mat in front of the door is coated in mud from the rainy season. Rather than knocking or ringing the doorbell, Sam decides to walk in unannounced but gives me a stern look and mouths “be nice” before turning the doorknob. I follow him in holding the bouquet of lilies he insisted I get for her. He assured me they would help keep the mood uplifting.
“Sam! How are you?” My mom almost runs to him, engulfing him in a tight hug. She backs up, still holding his shoulders, and says, “Really, though. How are you?”
“Leslie, I couldn’t be better.” He smiles with his teeth, dimples and all.
“That’s amazing. You’ll have to tell me all about this conference over dinner. I can’t wait to hear about it.” She squeezes his shoulder before turning to me, her short graying brown hair swaying behind her. “Hi, honey.” No hug. Barely even a smile.
“These are for you,” Sam says, taking the flowers from me and handing them to her.
She smiles brightly. “Oh Sam, you didn’t have to do that but thank you so much!” She presses her nose to one of the white lilies, taking a long sniff. She turns toward the kitchen and clicks her chunky heels on the hardwood floor. “Come sit!” she calls over her shoulder. “Cameron and Will are already here. They’re in the dining room. I’m going to find a vase for these.”
Sam immediately moves toward the dining room but stops when he realizes I haven’t started following him. “Abby, come on.”
I roll my eyes but don’t move from the entryway, hoping my expression is conveying my immense desire to go home.
“Abby,” he says, cocking his head to the side. He gives me the look of “if you don’t do what I ask, you’ll regret it” that I’ve come to know so well. “Lets. Go.”
“Sam, you know I don’t like family dinners. It always turns into a ‘be more like your sister’ conversation and I get shit on the whole night.”
He sighs and comes back over to me, cupping my face in his hands. “I like you. Not your sister. That’s what matters. Besides, I’ll keep the conversation away from that. Come on.” He holds a hand out for me to take, wiggling his fingers.
With a little hesitation, I take a deep breath before taking hold of his open hand and letting him guide me to the kitchen table. He pulls out an empty chair for me, allowing me to sit down before helping me push it back in, a gesture to show how much of a “good” boyfriend he is to anyone watching. Will sits across the table from me and offers a small smile through a thick brown beard but quickly sips his beer to avoid further interaction. He tends to be a man of few words when not spoken to. It’s one of the reasons I like him. Sam takes the seat next to me across from Cameron, leaving the two head chairs open for Mom to choose from.Please sit on the opposite end of me.
“How are you two?” Cameron starts. She pushes her glasses up her nose with a knuckle.
“We’ve been good,” Sam answers for us. “We’ve been busy. Especially me with my new job. I don’t want to get into too many details before Leslie comes out. I’ll wait for her before I dive into the good stuff.” He winks at no one in particular. “How about you two?”
I glance at my sister, those same blue eyes secretly eyeing me as well. She quickly turns her head toward Will, acting like I didn’t just catch her staring. It’s been a while since Cameron and I have been in the same room together, let alone talked in general. We’ve never been close. There’s a decent age gap between us, eight years to be exact.
“Good to hear. We’ve been doing pretty good, too. Cameron just got a promotion at work,” Will gloats.
“It’s barely a promotion,” Cameron tries to play it off.
“Honey, a promotion is a promotion. You should be proud! I know I am.” He rubs her back, smiling delightfully at her.
Of course, she got a promotion. Not that I’m not proud of her, but Cameron was always the perfect child growing up, graduating both high school and college with a 4.0 GPA. As much as I have tried to be a perfect child as well, I have apparently fallen short according to my mother. And now, she’s basically the perfect adult daughter, too. I, on the other hand, am not.
