My phone vibrates in my back pocket, and I smile, hoping Nick is calling to say he’ll be home soon. Yet it’s only a text reminding me of a staff meeting I’m scheduled to attend in the morning. I’d nearly forgotten. Luckily, Nick doesn’t have to go in early tomorrow. He’s usually able to arrive at work a little later following his call weekends. Thankfully, he can get the kids to school and daycare, so I can make the quarterly meeting.
Eliciting the kids’ help, I try to make a game of gathering the sheets from the guest rooms and collecting the dirty laundry from each of the kids’ rooms. This will take me hours to complete. Hopefully, it’ll keep my mind busy, so I don’t keep fretting over why my husband has been radio silent.
The evening arrives, and dinner is done. The kids are all bathed and ready for bed as their father walks in the door.
“Daddy,” Olivia yells as she runs to meet him.
“Hey, princess. I’ve missed you,” he says, crouching down to her eye level as he speaks.
“How’s everyone else? Did you have a good weekend with Luke and Jenna?”
They all nod and circle him for hugs before I come in for a kiss. “Hi. I missed you too.”
“Oh, yeah?” he asks. I hope it’s playful, but I’m on edge.
“I’m going to get these guys into bed. Come up and give them goodnight kisses after you’re settled.”
An hour later, the kids are down, and Nick joins me in the bedroom. He looks tired.
“Nick? Is something wrong? You haven’t been yourself this weekend.”
“I could say the same for you.”
“You’ve never not called before.”
“I’m sorry. I was just angry about having to take call again all weekend when Holden doesn’t seem to ever have to do it. He doesn’t even have kids. The guy doesn’t seem to have the same set of rules the rest of us have.” This conversation makes me feel like a Benedict Arnold for sitting with Holden, enjoying my Friday evening, while my husband had to spend the night miles away in case he got called-in to work.
“Then, I tried to work on the yard at the bungalow while I was there, and I got into a wasp nest and got stung. I’m embarrassed I had to go to the emergency room and ask Marty if he’d write me some prescriptions for steroids and an Epi-pen. I was worried something bad could happen after the fourth or fifth sting.”
“Oh, Nick. Why didn’t you say something?”
“I didn’t want to worry you. But the medicine made me tired, and I was worried I’d sleep through a consult call. Then that guy called looking for Holden, and I just lost my shit.”
Walking over to him, I wrap my arms around him and squeeze. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to help.”
“You couldn’t have done anything.”
“You must be exhausted.”
“Yeah.”
After this conversation, it’s decided. I can’t possibly talk to him about a baby in his current state. Maybe tomorrow.
“Oh, can you take the kids to school? I forgot I have a mandatory staff meeting at work in the morning.”
“Sure, babe,” he says around a very large yawn.
“Let’s get to bed. Hopefully, things will look much brighter in the morning.”
The sun peeks through the drapes, and I give Nick a kiss on the cheek. “I’m heading out.”
“Okay. How long will you be there?”
“I don’t know. They usually last a few hours.”
“Okay. I’ll try to catch up with you around lunchtime. Have a good day,” he adds.
I give each child a quick peck and head out the door.
