Page 103 of Always Be Mine
Lucy took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “I’m going back to Trickle Creek.”
“Did he call?”
She shook her head.
“Did you call him?”
“No. His sister called.”
Lucy spent the next few minutes filling Mandi in on her conversation with Charli. But even when she was finished explaining it, she wasn’t any closer to making sense of anything. All she knew was there was a feeling deep in her gut to go back.
“Are you going back because it’s what you want to do, or what youthinkyou should do?”
Lucy dropped her head back for a moment. “It’s the right thing to do.”
“Fuck that.” Mandi shook her head. “That’s not what I asked. What is ityouwant, Lucy?”
She couldn’t remember the last time she’d been asked that question. Whatdidshe want?
Lucy pushed her uneaten toast to the side. “It’s stupid.”
“I like stupid.”
Her lips twitched into a little smile, and she nodded. “I want the happy ending,” she said simply. “That’s it. I want the man, the family, the…I want it all.”
“You want Craig and Meri.”
It wasn’t a question, but Lucy nodded. “I do.” She dropped her head and took a deep breath before standing straight and exhaling. “But I also know I deserve better than being treated like a dirty secret.”
Mandi sat up and put her elbows on her knees. “I’m listening.”
It was as if all the puzzle pieces had finally clicked into place, and for the first time, Lucy could make sense of everything. “What happened with Ross screwed me up,” she started. “Probably more than I knew until recently. I know what he did was wrong. But that made me wrong, too.”
Mandi tried to interrupt, but she held her hand up to stop her.
“Maybe it wasn’t my fault, Mandi. But I think, on some level, I knew something wasn’t quite right. I’m not stupid. But I sure played the part. And I think, to some level, I did that with Craig, too.”
The more she spoke, the more everything made sense.
“I was still messed up from everything with Ross that I didn’t even realize I was letting myself fall into similar patterns.”
“I haven’t met him yet,” Mandi said. “But Craig doesn’t sound anything like the douche bag.”
She chuckled. “Oh no. Don’t get me wrong,” she added. “They are nothing alike. Ross made his decisions selfishly. And Craig…” She closed her eyes for a moment. “He made the decisions he did out of love.” She paused for a moment. “But the thing is, I let myself agree to less than I deserved by keeping our relationship a secret. That’s on me.”
“You care about him.”
She looked her friend dead in the eye. “I love him.”
“Yeah.” Mandi shrugged. “I know. I just wanted to hear you say it.”
“Well, I do. I love him, and I love Meri, and I love that little town and all the people in it.”
Mandi clapped, and Lucy laughed. A moment later, reality sank in, and she dropped her head into her hands on the kitchen counter.
“So what’s the problem?”
“It’s too late now.”
