“Who else knows!” It is a demand, not a question, as I bring my gun out and force it against his temple.
His smile once again graces his damn face and this time I don’t hold back as my fist collides with his thick skull forcing his head back into the brick further. His yell fills the room moments before I pull him off the wall and swing him around. Holding him by his shirt collar, I stare in his eyes knowing I am going to hell for what I am about to do with the fucking knowledge I just found out, what I have to do, and I don’t care one fucking bit if I take him with me.
“Tell me,” I hiss out, as I hold him hostage. His head is bleeding, and I look down briefly as it trickles down his neck. I look up to see his mouth is now bleeding too, and I find sick delight in his pain. Although he deserves so much fucking more for the oath he took in silence against me. Why? I don’t fucking know, but I am damn sure going to find out, right fucking now.
“What do you know Matteo?” I shout, as I take a step forcing him backward. His body shakes before his sinister laugh, low and slow, starts to rattle off the walls around us.
“Capo,” he begins to say, as his dark eyes reach to a place I don’t let anyone inside. “ThisAmica,she has you more twisted than I thought. You’ll never understand the power, the control, she already has over you, and always will.”
The truth shakes me to my core, and I force him away from me, needing space from theverita, thetruthhe knows about what Maria means to me, and the one I fear I will never escape.
Raising my pistol, I aim it at his head and find it surprising that he doesn’t even flinch. He stares back at me with a crazed look and grins, knowing that even if I end him, even if I take away from him the one thing that is most precious in this world, life, I’ve already lost and there is nothing I can do about it.
She wins. She always will. Always has. And there is nothing I can ever do to change that.
“Luigi will kill you himself once he finds out,” Matteo says, making me flinch slightly.
“He never will,” I whisper, as I cock my gun. “No witnesses.”
I pull the trigger before either of us blink. The center of his head my only target. The scene flashes quick before my eyes but repeats slowly as I watch him fall to the floor. The secrets he takes with him may be my only saving grace with the boss after I hand over what he wants most.
Maria Nitti.
If I can even bring my black heart to do what I need to now. Something tells me I won’t, and never could. A reality that cripples me, only making me more vulnerable to the way I feel about her. The way I will always feel about her, and always have.
Chapter 16
Maria
The yacht sways back and forth as we crash across the sea and the shadows of night grow darker. I sit in the dark lounge and watch the half empty bottle on the table in front of me tilt back and forth as the boat creaks and takes us back to Rome. I thought the alcohol would dull the fire, the one that I wanted to quench inside me the moment Leo walked out on me an hour ago, but I quickly found it was no use as I poured myself another shot, one that is still sitting next to the bottle on the table in front of me because deep down I know nothing will stop it.
I hear footsteps on the deck outside the door and instinctively my head snaps in their direction. But the person passes quickly and my heart sinks knowing that it wasn’t him. He didn’t come. He won’t come. And the reality of it all hurts more than I ever thought possible.
He wants to wrestle? Fuck, I am game.
With a quick urgency to meet him at his tricks, I push off the couch and make my way to the door. He knows I can’t overpower him, but I can challenge him, and hell if the thought doesn’t sound like the best idea I have had in days.
Confident I know what I am doing, I pull on the door handle and make my way out into the hallway in the middle of the ship. The only light that guides me is small sconces on the walls as I try and remember my way back to the master bedroom. Not sure where Leo headed after leaving me earlier, I figure by now he might be there and it’s the best place I can think of to start looking.
The sconces flicker once, and I stand still for a moment before the lights go out. My breathing quickens and I look to my right and my left in fear of what happens if we lose power before I quickly begin to walk further and take my next right.
My feet quicken their pace as I make my way through the halls. My body beginning to hum with one need, to feel his dominance and silence my fucking mind, even if it is the last damn time. My tormented mind that keeps trailing back to my past before it gets pulled into my present and I realize how much my life is pointless, useless, and disposable.
When I find him, he won’t know what fucking hit him. He will have to earn every fucking bit of his dominance over me tonight. A victory I know I will gladly give him, if he only lets me back in, just once, and makes me feel like he did before.
Leonardo
I roll my shoulders as I shut down my computer and look at the time. It’s close to midnight, and I didn’t get much fucking work done with my mind consumed with only one damn thing.
Maria.
I run my hands through my hair as I round my desk and make my way back to my room. The boat crashes hard against the waves and makes me take hold of the dresser to my left. The lights flash and then go out. Rolling my eyes, I wait a moment and find relief when the backup generator kicks on and the room lights up once more.
Pushing off the dresser, I make my way to the bar across the room and pour myself a large glass of water. Scotch sounds better, but all alcohol would do right now would be to make me weak. Would make me go back on every fucking thing I know and storm back to that lounge, grab Maria, and make her promise to never leave me again.
My weakness.The only thing I could ever need in this world. A queen I would gladly kneel before for the rest of my life, and the only woman ever strong enough to be in my world. To stand by my side. To rule with me, but I could never let her.
She is a fucking Nitti and my allegiance is to the Lombardis’. I couldn’t break the alliance, even if I wanted to. I would be a dead man before I ever walked away, and then where would that leave us? I swore no one would ever hurt her, and I fucking meant it. Including me. If she feels for me the way I do for her, my death would ruin her and for that I have to walk away.
