I let myself get lost in the silence that surrounds me once the movement stops behind me and I am consumed once again by my thoughts. When his hand reaches out to me from behind, I jump, startled and scared, still hearing the angry words of my father in my mind. Turning around to look at him, I see concern in his eyes before a hatred fills his stare and he looks to the floor.
“Who hurt you, Mia?” His low deep voice rumbles through the night as he takes a step closer and I instinctively take one back. I know Leo won’t hurt me. Not now. Not after he built me up, made me trust, and took away every inhibition that I had when it came to him. But the past, the hell, the flashbacks that drag me under with them are still controlling my every thought and I can’t make it stop.
I swallow over a lump in my throat and look to the floor. “Who said anyone hurt me?” I ask shyly, as I pull the robe around my frame tighter. My heart hammers in my chest from the lie I just told because in the little amount of time I have come to know the man in front of me, I know without any doubt he won’t take that kind of response as a definite answer.
My eyes see his feet move a step closer, and I worry my bottom lip between my teeth. Time pauses as he draws out the silence waiting for me to tell him the truth. But speaking of the kind of torment that was my world, my life, my every fucking day in the past would give it too much power. The only way to not have it rule me is to let it slowly die in the memories of my mind. I have mastered the trick, letting it slowly disappear into the shadows, and only have moments, flashbacks, most of which are seldom anymore.
“Answer me!” His low stern voice demands, before I lift my eyes and find his a mixture of emotions. Hate. Vengeance. Aggression. Punishment, all staring back at me. But I know not all of them are directed at me.
“I told you, I’m better off not finding my father, Leo. I have reasons for that.” His eyes flash with recognition as his jaw clenches and he takes a step forward.
“Tell me, everything, Mia. Now!”
I don’t know why, and I can’t bring myself to understand what changes inside me, but I open up to him and let every dark thing I’ve been holding in fall at his feet hopeful he has the power to finally make it all stop.
“I don’t remember much from when I was little,” I begin, as I move around him and make my way back into the room. I look back and watch his eyes follow me, but he stays still. “My first memories I have, are of my mother and father fighting, before my father would get drunk and yell for my mother to keep quiet. What about? I don’t know. I must have been eight or nine.” I sit on the edge of his bed and look up to see him still standing in the same spot, eyes trained on me, and waiting patiently for me to continue.
“I was young, but old enough to see Mom taking pills from a bottle she kept in her purse every time the arguing would start. One after another, she would pop them until she’d fall into the closest chair, couch, bed and slowly start to fade away. But my father, he was just getting started.”
“What do you mean, ‘just getting started?’” I hear Leo growl before he takes a step towards me.
I look to the floor, unable to meet his stare again before I continue. “Hiding in the shadows didn’t help. He always found me. And when he did, I would have been safer in hell facing Satan himself than the man who raised me.”
“How?”
It is a one word question, but for some reason I can’t bring myself to answer it as I stare at the ground in front of me. Shaking my head from side to side, I war with my mind as my heart tells me to trust him. To open up and let him know everything. But my mind, my mind wants to keep the memories for itself so it can torment me with everything I know and everything he can’t change, no matter how much I trust him, want him to, and need him to help me.
“Mia,” he grates out, as I feel him drop to the floor in front of me. I look up and see this strong man on his knees, eyes full of worry and vengeance, and I want so badly to tell him but I can’t bring myself to say a word. “Damn it, let me help you.” I hear him say as a tear falls down my cheek.
“The only way you can help me Leo is to silence my mind, the one that tells me that I deserved it. The part of me that feels like I could have stopped it, if only I was someone… something else. The memories that won’t stop and the horror that is mine, and mine alone, every damn time I close my eyes and fall into a place I’d rather fucking forget. But you can’t!”
My body shakes at my admission as I stare deep into his eyes and see his jaw tick. He grinds his jaw together before standing and staring down at me. “He will pay, Mia.” I hear him promise as my body shakes before more tears fall. “With his life.”
I look to the floor and nod, too broken, too damaged to even try and deny the fact that I would gladly kill him myself if he was to lay another finger on me, ever. Thoughts begin to pull me under again as my head falls into my hands before I hear Leo bark out a command above me.
“Stand up!”
I look up at him, confused, but he stares back at me with such authority is scares me, thrills me, excites me as my mind slowly lets the torment fade and I do what he says. Slowly rising, he takes a step forward and power, control, dominance radiates off of him as he looks down at my body before ripping the robe from me.
“You need to be released, silenced, let go, Mia,” he quietly says. “I can give you that.”
His hands move quickly as he spins me around and holds me tight against his frame. Slowly, his hands rise up my body, stopping at my breasts as he cups them in his hands and slowly molds them in his large palms. My head falls back against his shoulder as I let myself get lost in the feeling of his hands on my body as one of them trails south to my opening right before memories surface and my body slightly stiffens against him. He feels my tension and slaps my sex causing me to come back to the presence.
“Mia,” He growls in my ear as his fingers playfully tease my slit. “I can give you what you are afraid to ask for.” He whispers, as his other hand releases my breast before I feel it grab my hip possessively. “What you crave. To quiet your mind. To free your thoughts and feel your release when I control your body giving you the best fucking pleasure you’ve ever had.”
I moan as his hands trail down to my upper thighs slowly before he yanks them open and quickly thrusts a finger inside me. I gasp out, not sure how to respond.
“Show you that the only way I’ll ever touch you, push you, release you, is through indulging in your deepest fantasies.” I begin to fall forward but his strong hand against my other thigh keeps me tightly in place. “No one hurts you again, Mia! The only one ever allowed to touch you, please you, satisfyeverythingyou ever wanted, needed,” his voice is low as he slowly releases his palm on my thigh but never withdraws his fingers from inside me. “Is me!” His free hand rises before he pushes me down slowly until my arms are bracing myself upon the edge of the bed and his fingers dig deeper inside my opening.
His other hand comes from behind and replaces his fingers from in front of me. I groan from the sensation of both of his hands inside of me before he pulls the first away making me let out a sound of disapproval needing to feel more again. Before I can enjoy the way his fingers feel from behind me, I feel a sharp slap to my ass as my eyes widen and I hold my breath. His hand returns to the place it just hit and he rubs it tenderly before I feel his hard length pressed up against my rear.
Slightly scared, and majorly turned on, I bite down on my lip and try and process all of what is suddenly happening before I hear him speak above me. “Fuck, do you know how damn sexy you are?” He growls, as his fingers dive inside me deeper before he pulls them out and spreads my wetness all the way back across my ass. I moan from the feeling before his hands drive forward once again and back inside my folds.
I don’t answer, and that earns me another smack across my ass. With his fingers deep inside me and my tender flesh burning from his blow, I purr out in ecstasy and don’t even realize my mistake until another smack hits my other cheek.
“Answer me, Mia!” Leo demands.
“No,” I moan, as I feel him drop to his knees and his tongue enters my sex from behind. I hear him hum as he laps up my juices and his fingers trail forward, pinching my nipples and sending a jolt straight to my clit.
