Page 82 of My Fiancé's Brother
I swallowed hard. Then I turned bright red. I sputtered, “Yes, the cherry filling is a nice contrast.”
I picked up my water glass and took a few gulps, trying to cool myself off. For a second there I thought he was referencing something other than the filling. I seriously needed to get my mind out of the gutter.
“So which one do you want?”
“Black Forest cake,” I said, bending my head over the sheet.
Jackson opened the door, and a second later, Margaret came waltzing in. She brought us over to stand in front of a table of decorated cakes, talking to us about shapes and tiers and icing design. All I could think of was how close Jackson stood next to me. He leaned in and said into my ear very quietly. “I wasn’t talking about the filling when I said I liked cherries.”
My mouth dropped open. Margaret starting showing us cakes and pictures and discussing sizes and shapes. I couldn’t think. My mind was swirling. Did Jackson just tell me that he liked virgins? I was a virgin! I could feel my face burning hot and red. I couldn’t think.
Margaret asked me a question that didn’t register.
I said, “What do you think Jackson?”
What did he mean he liked cherries? A vision of him laying me down on the bed and deflowering me washed through my mind. My stomach hurt at the thought. It would be terrifying to get naked in front of him. I felt myself flush again.
Margaret was looking at me. Had she just asked me a question? “I agree with Jackson.”
Margaret tilted her head and gave me a quizzical look. Jackson gave a soft snort beside me. They started to talk again, but I wasn’t paying attention.
What was going through his mind? Didn’t he know that comments like that threw me completely for a loop? He might take that joking lightly, but it left me reeling with crazy, awkward thoughts about naked bodies and him doing devastatingly delicious things to my body.
This whole situation was torture. Okay. I was attracted to him, but I was all wrong for him. Not to mention that I was engaged. Engaged! To Matt.
Both Jackson and Margaret were looking at me expectedly.
“You decide Jackson,” I breathed. It’s not like he had propositioned me. I mean, he was just teasing me. And even if someone like Jackson wanted to do something sexy with me, he was all wrong for me. He worked a dangerous job. He was precisely the opposite of the kind of guy I needed to marry. We were incompatible on every level. So why did my heart race every time I had inappropriate thoughts about him?
How could I possibly marry someone like Matt when I didn’t want to be with him like I wanted to be with Jackson?
The traitorous thought blurted into my mind, and I almost stopped breathing. Oh, my God. What was happening to me? I was engaged to Matt. I wobbled on my feet. I was a heartbeat away from having a panic attack. Why was this happening to me?
I feel trapped in my engagement.
Oh, my God. I needed to get control over this situation, or I would ruin everything. My feelings would destroy my future.
Jackson put a huge warm hand on my hip, and he tugged me closer, looking down at me like a loving fiancé would look down at his future bride. “You okay, sweetheart?”
I'm pretty sure my heart didn’t know whether to stop beating entirely or to pound wildly out of my chest. For a brief second, I thought I was going to faint in his arms. The scent of cake overwhelmed my senses. Choking me. I struggled to breathe. I fanned my face. “Just a bit hot.”
He ducked his head, so his face was close to mine. Green eyes looked at me with concern. “Do you need to sit down?”
I wasn’t sure my legs would make it to a chair.
I whispered in complete desperation. “Please get me out of here.”
Jackson put his arm around me and turned me around and started walking me towards the door. “Emily needs some fresh air.”
“Oh, of course,” Margaret’s voice sounded so far away.
With Jackson’s help, I staggered out into the sunshine. He lifted me onto the back tailgate of his truck.
“Put your head down,” he said, holding my arm while I awkwardly dropped my head between my legs.
“Deep breaths,” he encouraged.
I took several deep breaths and then my world started to right itself again. His legs disappeared, and I heard the truck door slam. Then he was pressing a bottle of water into my hands.
