“Uh… Hm, I’m sorry if I’m being rude or something, but… Who are you?”
Evie is still laughing, but it doesn’t look like she’s mocking me or offended.
“We’re personal care workers,” Ikram says softly while Evie plays with the sand, a soft smile on her face. From the corner of my eye, I see Jack tensing slightly. “We started this morning and we will be taking care of everything Jack needs and can’t do. Either some shopping, meal prep, if he needs assistance for a shower or a bath, or even like now, if he wants to go to the beach but his wheelchair can’t take him.”
Personal care workers. He never said he wanted to hire personal care workers before. I’m usually handling the shopping and meal prep and taking him to appointments… Does he not want my help anymore? Did I overstep when I told him that maybe we shouldn’t move and listen to the doctor’s advice? Oh my god, is he…
“Stop overthinking all this,” he plays with a strand of my hair distractedly. “I just want to be your big brother. I’m tired of being a burden.”
“Jack, you’re not,” I say firmly.
He sighs. “I am, Sunshine. You almost never do anything for yourself. You used to love working with the police and you stopped because you didn’t want to take the ferry in case something happened to me. You never go out and make friends, and I’m sure Hot Grumpy Guy was the first man you had sex with in about five years.”
I cast a quick glance towards Evie and Ikram, talking with each other, giving us what looks like privacy.
“I don’t care about all that,” I grit my teeth. “I care about you, and making sure you’re okay and as well as possible.”
“Well you don’t need to anymore,” he shrugs with a little smile. “Now, you can have your own life, and when we spend time together, it can be like it used to. Evie and Ikram will be with me every weekday from 9 to 5, and then there will be someone on call for the week-ends and during the night. So if I fall, or if I’m stuck at 3 in the morning, someone will come help me out.”
I blink slowly, my throat closing up. “You know that’s the only reasonmom and dad adopted you, right? What good are you if you can’t even help him anymore?” Tham had hated me for a long time, but this particular day still stings a little. I know now that he had just said that because he was upset and he knew it would hurt me. I broke my arm and the responsibility of helping Jack had fallen on Tham. Later when I left for college, he apologized about the way he had treated me. After all, our parents never should have asked him or me to “take care” of Jack for them. But since they were not as helpful to him as they should have been, I took it upon myself.
He’s my brother. The only sibling who’s actually ever cared about me.
And now, he doesn’tneedme anymore.
What if this changes things? Now that I won’t be helpful, what if he…
No. No, Jack’s not like that. Hecares.
“Oh. Are you… are you sure? I don’t…”
“I’m sure Sunshine.” He slides his hand in my hair to ruffle it with a grin. “Let’s just be normal siblings for once. I want you to do whatever you want to do, and come home and tell me all about it without worrying about medical stuff, or me.”
I wonder what changed. If when he talked alone with the Doctor in Seattle, something happened, and now he wants me out of the medical issues.
Is he getting worse and doesn’t want me to find out?
“But what if…”
“Prue,” he interrupts more firmly. “That’s what I want. Don’t overthink this.”
I frown and nod, holding back more protests.
What am I going to do now? If he doesn’t want me to take care of him at all, should I go back to work with the police? No more part-time boring jobs in shitholes? I could never just stay home and do nothing, even though we don’t really need the money.
Maybe I will. Or maybe I’ll take some time to myself. Travel? No. I’m done traveling for a while, even though it would be really different if I were doing this alone just for myself.
No, I want to settle down a little. See what this place has to offer. Maybe I’ll make friends for once. I can totally spend my days busy without worrying for my brother, right?
6
THOSE HYPOTHETICAL HYPOCRITES.
Jack: Where are you?
Jack: The physiotherapist will be here in one hour, and I’d like to introduce you.
Prudence: I went for a run in the park.
