Page 56 of The Wonder of You
Henry screams as he stands, hitting the table with his fists. It was going to happen eventually. His fury was shimmering just under the surface, ready to break out any moment.
Losing one person has been hard enough. He can’t stand here and listen to Phoenix wanting to die out of choice!
“You think I’ll let you go there again? He wasn’t able to give you answers. You have no excuse to go there. I’ll tie you down if I have to!”
“Henry!” Toni pleads, but he can only see red.
“You’re not the only one who misses her, we’re all trying to deal with this.” Henry adds.
Phoenix’s face expression changes from the usual sadness to anger. No one else feels what he feels, how can anyone think otherwise? He rushes forward and pushes Henry.
“Are you fucking kidding?”
“Stop it, Phoenix. You know what I mean,” Henry replies. Phoenix isn’t strong enough to push him over. He is able to firmly stand his ground. “Please, you’re my friend. My brother. I want to help you, but I don’t know how. All I can offer is being here.”
With that, all the anger leaves Phoenix as he drops to the floor. On his knees, he bends down so his face is touching the ground.
He cries. Deep, body-shaking cries take over him. Every sob from Phoenix is like a stab to Henry’s heart. He leans down and rests his head on Phoenix’s back to comfort him.
“I need her!” Phoenix howls. Toni kneels beside him and runs her hand through his hair and tries to sooth him.
“It’ll be okay. It has to be,” she insists.
They stay there for a while, comforting one another. When Phoenix has worn himself out a little, Henry helps him back to his cabin and into his bed.
“Soulmates always find each other,” he states while pulling the bed covers up to Phoenix’s neck. Like a father, he almost wants to lean down and kiss him goodnight. He chooses not to. Instead, he leaves the cabin with one more reflective thought for his friend.
“The phoenix disappears after it is destroyed. But italwayscomes back.Always.”
Chapter 40
Mortal Land
Bath, England
2023
Phoenix puts the table of painted rocks out for the first time in years. The stall had been taken down not long after Renée’s death. A few people considered putting it back up, laying out her rocks. They didn’t want to risk a bad reaction from Phoenix though. Phoenix is glad Toni suggested this, it might help him.
He admires the rocks, running his hand over each of them.
“How long are you going to be?” he whispers to no one. He feels like he’s connecting with Renée, even though she’s been gone for so long. And yet still, the pain he feels in his chest is too much. Even after all this time, he can’t see a world without her. But he must wait for her. He must.
Henry and Lukas watch him from one of the tents nearby.
“She was everything to him, wasn’t she? And to all of us. She never failed to raise a smile from us all.” Henry smiles, though tears are threatening to unleash. Renée was like a little sister to him.
“I want to thank her for saving Maudie. She was like a mother to her. She did more than her actual mother did, to be honest,” Lukas says as he sighs.
“You will get to tell her one day.”
***
Phoenix sits in his cabin, alone as usual.
He stares at the photographs on the wall. The memories captured there feel like a distant dream now, after so many years. And yet, when he looks at her beautiful face, he can convince himself that she’s there with him. He tries to hold back the tears, but her presence feels so real to him when he stares at her for long enough. It almost makes him feel happy again.
He closes his eyes and forces himself to believe she is actually here, their arms wrapped around one another. He wishes he could feel her in his embrace so he could keep her safe, keep her where she belongs.
