Page 79 of Bound By Thorns
“Zarek and Leora should be here in a bit,” her smile was soft yet strained.
She brushed a strand of hair from my forehead, her eyes searching mine intently, almost pleadingly.
“What’s wrong, Chaos?” I prodded gently.
She hesitated, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears, then looked away. “I was so fucking scared I’d never see those eyes again. I watched them, every day, checking for any sign… afraid they’d dilate one last time and I’d lose you,” her voice cracked, and a sob escaped her. “I thought I might lose you forever!”
Her grief washed over her in waves, her body shaking as the sobs took hold. I reached out, helpless in the face of her pain, my heart squeezing tight. Another pain I had caused, another scar I had left on her heart. But as I watched her break down, something within me shifted. This time, I understood—she didn’t need my sacrifices; she needed me, simply and profoundly, just me. I vowed then, silently but fiercely, to never let her face such fear alone again.
???
“Would you fucking stop?” Leora’s sharp voice sliced through the kitchen noise, her irritation clear as crystal. I was elbow-deep in soap suds, trying to clean up after our dinner—a small contribution, but one that sparked yet another dispute.
“I’m just washing dishes, Leo. I can handle standing up now,” I said, rolling my eyes, a bit amused by her fuss.
She marched into the kitchen, her movements swift and decisive, as she nudged me aside to take over the sink. “We’ve got this. You’ve been home less than three weeks, Logan, and you’re already overdoing it.”
Her frown deepened, her hands moving briskly over the plates that I had intended to wash. I watched her for a moment, perplexed by her persistent worry.
“Leo?” I tried to catch her attention, but she continued scrubbing fiercely, ignoring my attempts.
“Leo, look at me.” Firmly, I placed my hands on her shoulders, turning her to face me. Her eyes met mine, a mix of frustration and concern swirling in them.
“What now?” she scoffed, her voice thick with exasperation.
“What’s going on?” I probed gently. “You’ve been so distant since I got back from the hospital. You barely talk to me, and when you do, it feels like you’re always pissed.”
She let out a heavy sigh, the kind that seemed to carry the weight of the world. “You died twice on that operating table, Lo. Then you were in a coma. And now, just because you survived, you act like you’re invincible.You’re not, Logan.You’re not invincible.”
And then she went from angry Leora to openly sobbing Leora. “How many time do we need to lose you?”
For a moment, I was speechless, absorbing the full impact of her fears. I’d been so caught up in proving I was still strong, still capable, that I’d completely overlooked the toll my near-deathexperience had taken on everyone around me. They’d seen me wither away.Again.
Fuck.
I’d been so blind, so selfish. Caught up in squaring things with Kaylan, focusing on expediting my recovery, I’d almost forgotten how my own battles were affecting everyone else. It hit me hard, realizing just how tough it would have been for them to face losing me again. Especially for Leora.
“Listen,” I began, the words heavy in my throat, “I’m sorry. I know those weeks in the hospital were probably hell. I’m trying to rest up properly now—for Kaylan’s sake, for all of our sakes.” I paused, taking a deep breath. “I’m itching to get back on my feet faster, so I can help out. Kabir and Amelia are neck-deep in dismantling that Crazon device, you and the others are wrangling information from the prisoners, and Kaylan’s swamped with her new role at the Blackthorn clinic. I feel useless, Leo.”
Leora gave me a gentle smile through her tears, her arms wrapping around me in a reassuring embrace. “You’re not useless, Logan. You saved us back there—Kabir, Kaylan, and me. Without you, Garret’s men might have had their way.” Her grip tightened, her presence a comforting weight. “You need to rest, really rest. Stop trying to rush your recovery.”
I nodded, resting my head against hers, a wave of gratitude washing over me as I kissed her temple softly. At that moment, Zarek walked in, Kaylan in tow, eyeing us with a mix of concern and curiosity.
“If you made her cry again,” Zarek began, his tone half-joking, half-warning.
“Relax,” I chuckled, rolling my eyes. “We were just talking.”
Releasing Leora, I made my way over to Kaylan, my legs shaky. Leora was right; I needed to slow down, to really take the time to heal.
That night, I scrapped my overly ambitious one-month recovery plan for a more realistic two-month-long schedule. Kaylan listened intently as I laid out my new plan. Her agreement was immediate. It dawned on me then—she’d been carrying the same weight as Leora.
Feeling overwhelmingly thankful to be surrounded by people who loved me enough to accept my temporary helplessness, I embraced my slower pace. Kaylan was a constant during my physio sessions, supporting me, ensuring I stayed active even after the therapists had gone.
Each day, I discovered new facets of Kaylan’s strength and resilience, her assertiveness blossoming in ways that both surprised and delighted me.
We started to heal together, as I had once promised her we would. My love for her deepened, a steady constant that reassured me no matter how much time it took to heal, she and I were in this together. And day by day, as I learned more about her, my heart secured her place in it forever.
I kept falling in love with her—more and more daily until I knew the cycle would never stop. She would forever be etched into my heart.
