Page 42 of Bound By Thorns
I met her gaze, her unwavering determination catching me off guard.
“Okay,” I said finally, my voice barely above a whisper.
“Good,” she said. “Because we need you, Lo. Not just Gunner.You. Logan.”
SEVENTEEN
Kaylan
“You said last time that you feel responsible,” Dr. Gabriella Mendoza said, her tone gentle but direct. The therapy room was quiet except for the faint ticking of a clock on the wall. I sat stiffly on the couch, hands clasped in my lap. “For what happened to you. For what happened to Logan. Let’s start there.”
Not pulling punches, I see.
I let out a hollow laugh. “I don’t justfeelresponsible. Iamresponsible. If I had been stronger, smarter—if I had fought harder, maybe we could’ve escaped sooner.”
Gabriella tilted her head slightly, her expression softening. “Kaylan, think about where that belief comes from. You were in a situation where everything was designed to make you feel powerless, to make you feel like it was your fault. But that doesn’t make it true.”
“You don’t get it. If I had done more, Logan wouldn’t have suffered for that long.Iwouldn’t have suffered for that long.”
“Or… maybe the guilt you feel is manufactured. Think of it this way,” she adjusted in her seat, “if you had escaped at any other time, before or after, the Blackthorn team might not have been there to help you. Something else could’ve gone wrong and you’d feel guilty overthatinstead.”
Or we would’ve, most definitely died, and I wouldn’t be feeling guilty over anything.
But I didn’t say anything. The silence grew heavier until she spoke again.
“How’s your training going?” she asked.
“Fine,” I replied automatically. “I’m keeping up.”
Her brow lifted slightly. “That’s not very convincing.”
I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck. “It’s fine,” I repeated. “I take Advil for the abdominal pain, and it helps.”
“Abdominal pain?” she asked. “When did that start?”
I shrugged. “A while ago. After I was taken. It’s… it’s nothing.”
“Try, Kaylan,” she gently pressed. “Tell me more.”
I hesitated, my hands tightening into fists. “There was a pregnancy,” I said finally, my voice brittle. “Two, actually. And then abortions. They weren’t… hygienic. Death would’ve been merciful after what they did to me. So… yeah. I have an infection that requires me on a few medications.”
Her eyes softened, but she didn’t speak, giving me space to continue.
“I thought Garret would kill me, you know?” I said, my voice cracking. “When I first arrived there and they killed Riley and Kyle, I thought I’d be next. But I wasn’t.”
“Why not?” Gabriella asked gently.
“Because I was useful,” I said bitterly. “I was a combat medic. So I became a whore and a doctor for them.”
The words hung in the air, cold and sharp. Gabriella didn’t flinch, didn’t look away.
“I was fine for two months,” I said quietly. “I did what I had to do. I survived. And then… I don’t know. I wanted to get the hell out of there.”
“Why?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” I replied quickly, too quickly. “I just… I couldn’t stay anymore.”
Gabriella leaned forward slightly. “What happened at the two-month mark? Can you think back to that time?”
