Page 5 of Without Pride and Prejudice
FITZ
PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE AWAKE. I have the best news to share with you!I read Monroe’s text repeatedly in the dark, feeling more unsettled than ever and fearing the worst.Scrubbing a hand over my unshaved face, I sat up in bed and flipped on my bedside lamp as if the light would help the situation. Unfortunately, it only amplified the words glaring back at me on the screen while the pit in my stomach grew.
As many times as Monroe had told me she thought this Tony bloke was The One, and that she had a feeling he would be proposing, I didn’t want to believe it. I didn’t believe it. The knobhead drove a van with a toilet pictured on its side. Tony wasn’t the one for her. He didn’t appreciate Monroe, and he didn’t deserve her. He’d never watched any musicals with her. I’d watched dozens, and she’d subjected me to their soundtracks whenever we were together in a car. Hell, she’d even convinced me to sing along with her a few times, though I would never admit it. Her enthusiasm was too infectious sometimes. She was just plain infectious.
I was the one for her, not Tony.
Before I could compose myself enough to call her, she texted again, this time with a photo of her delicate hand, an unmistakable, glaring engagement ring on her left finger.He popped the question, and I said yes. I’ll only be a happy bride if my best friend is by my side. Please be my maid of honor. Or best man of honor.Several laughing emoji faces followed.
I tossed the phone to the side and fell back on my pillows, feeling as if I couldn’t breathe. For years I’d told myself I could watch her get married and be happy for her and the lucky guy, but it was a lie. I couldn’t watch the woman I loved marry another man. Especially the likes of Tony. I probably should have said something about him before now, but I couldn’t be sure if my misgivings about him were because of my feelings for Monroe or whether the man really was a prat. Something about him just didn’t sit right, even though Monroe had never once complained about him. No, she’d gone on nauseatingly about what a right chummy fellow he was.Tony brings me a latteevery morning at the studio on his way to work. Tony takes me on picnic lunches. Tony took me stargazing. Tony likes to cook with me in the kitchen.He was a damn saint who could apparently walk on water, and I wanted to beat him to a bloody pulp.
But the man I was most upset with was me. All these years I’d kept Monroe at arm’s length. My reasons were noble—I was protecting her from the unbearably bright spotlight that was always on me as the son of a duke, the heir to the title.
My phone buzzed. Monroe was calling. I wanted to ignore it, but I always answered her calls, no matter the time or place. Steeling myself, I clicked the green button and put her on speaker.
“I’m engaged!” she squealed before I could even say hello.
“Congratulations,” I said stiffly, not meaning a word of it.
“I’m sure I woke you up. I’m so sorry, but I had to tell you first. Did you see the ring? Isn’t it beautiful? I love the floral halo design. It’s perfect, don’t you think?”
“I haven’t looked at it, but I’m sure it’s lovely.” My mouth felt drier with every lie. But I couldn’t tell her the truth. Not when she was so happy.
“We haven’t set a date yet, but when we do, you have to,have tobe my best man of honor. We’ll get you like a peach tux or something, because you know that I’ve always wanted my bridesmaids to wear peach. And that means you have to throw me a bridal shower.” She laughed that glorious laugh of hers.
There was no way in hell I was throwing her a bridal shower or being her best man of honor. Certainly, you would never find me in a peach tux. “Monroe, please ask one of your girlfriends to take my place.”
“But no one can take your place.” She said it so sincerely, it pricked my stony heart.
Someonehadtaken my place, and I hated him. “They’ll have to for this.” I stood firm. No matter the date of the wedding, I would find any excuse not to attend.
“Oh.” She sounded deflated and hurt. “I understand. Peach isn’t your color. Blue looks good on you,” she teased. “I’ll change my colors for you.”
I chuckled half-heartedly, trying to play off this bloody mess. “That won’t be necessary. I’m not wearing a blue tux or being your maid of honor.”
“As long as you’re there,” she said brightly.
I cleared my throat, not wanting to lie to her again or to get her hopes up. “Let me know when you decide on a date.”
“You’ll be the first to know. Maybe you can come help me pick out my wedding dress.”
Was she trying to kill me? If I had to witness her in her wedding gown, there was no telling what I might do. “You have Grams and your father for that. And my teaching schedule is busy.”
“Oh, right, Mr. Professor. Or I guess I should call you Dr. Fitzroy. Or Dr. Fitz?” She giggled. “I know I’ve said it a hundred times before, but I’m really proud of you. One of the youngest professors at Oxford. I brag about you all the time.”
Her kindness made the heavy weight of my guilt and lies feel crushing. “Thank you, Monroe. It means the world to me. You mean the world to me.” It was the closest I could come to telling her how much I loved her.
“You know, sometimes you’re the sweetest.”
“Monroe, let’s go tell your dad,” Tony called in the background. What a prick.
“I guess I’d better go. Sorry to call so late, or early for you.”
“You can call me anytime. I mean that. Day or night if ever you need anything.”
She paused for a moment. “You make it sound as if we’ll never talk or see each other again.”
I feared that was going to be our future—a life without each other. “I’d never wish that.”
