Page 25 of Without Pride and Prejudice
That piece of etiquette pierced my heart a bit. I knew if Fitz and I became a romantic item, the gossip would run rampant, and it would be cruel. And while I tried not to care what other people said about me, I had a feeling that the situation would be different if the press and media made jokes about me here in the UK—or worse, about Fitz.
Lady Catherine droned on about how well-bred people walked uprightly, moved with grace and ease, and never used vulgarity. Apparently I wasn’t well bred, because I was thinking some choice words about her and Lady Winnifred, who whispered in my ear from behind, “I hope you’re listening and taking notes.”
I wrung my hands together, silently asking myself: What would Elizabeth do? Yes, that was going to be my new mantra—WWED. I knew one thing for sure: She wouldn’t draw attention to herself, but would think of something witty to say that got her point across. Sadly, I couldn’t think of anything along those lines. Ugh. I was letting Jane Austen down in a big, big way. She obviously disliked the Carolines of her day, but I could only sit there and hold my tongue.Sorry, Jane.This wasn’t theexperience I’d been hoping for. I wanted to just pretend not to like Caroline Bingley, not actually hate her.
“Now let’s practice the art of the curtsy and bow, as well as properly addressing those within your family, your peers, and those above your station.”
“That would be me,” Lady Winnifred whispered in my ear again.
This time, I turned around and replied with a comeback I thought worthy of Jane Austen. “Not here, Miss Bingley,” I said in my best British accent. “My father is a gentleman and owns an estate. Can you say the same?”
Winnifred tsked at first, affronted, but then she smiled like an evil Cheshire Cat. “I meant in all the ways that count, dear.” Condescension stuck to every word like molasses.
Dang. She. Was. Good. Awful, but good.
I turned around after that brutal takedown, and Jane squeezed my hand, offering me some sympathy. More and more, I empathized with Elizabeth and all she had working against her. I was probably my own worst enemy, but Elizabeth was at times too. She was too proud to hear anything against Wickham at first, and look at the harm that caused. I didn’t feel ready for the Carolines of my world. Sure, I’d learned to laugh them off back in school. But this was different. There would be an enormous cost to be with Fitz. Was I willing to pay for it? I didn’t have time to think about it.
“Everyone, stand and turn to the person next to you,” Lady Catherine instructed. “We will start with the ladies. For a proper curtsy, shift the weight to your left foot while you bring the ball of your right foot behind.” She demonstrated perfectly. “Then you slightly bend your knees while doing a gentle bow of the head. Nothing dramatic, but also don’t rush. And be sure to look down when bowing the head, but when the head lifts, make eye contact.” She made it look easy enough.
I looked over and caught Fitz’s eye, wondering if he remembered the night back in school when I’d made him teach me how to do a proper curtsy—you know, just in case I ever ran into the Queen. Obviously, that had never happened, but it was still a fun night, even if Fitz pretended to grumble about it. But he’d made sure I could curtsy with the best of them. A knowing smile ticked up on his handsome face, telling me he remembered as well.
I thought back to all the nights Fitz would sneak over to our small flat, which was not far from the school. Our alma mater was a boarding school and a day school, and Fitz was part of the boarding crowd. My dad would play us his old Billy Joel records and make us American-style cheeseburgers and fries. Then I would play the old out-of-tune piano Dad had rented for me to practice on while we lived in the UK. While I played, I’d sing my little heart out. Often Fitz would sit on the piano bench with me, not saying much of anything, but occasionally he’d request his favorites. Often it would be something by the Beatles, like “Hey Jude.” But oddly, his most requested song was “And So It Goes” by Billy Joel. Of course, it pleased Dad that he’d made a Billy Joel fan out of Fitz. But I’d always wondered why he loved that song so much. I mean, it’s beautiful, but kind of sad, about a man who guards his heart. Had Fitz been guarding his heart around me? All I know is that each time he left, my dad would say, “I like that kid,” and I would think how much I liked him too.
“Practice,” demanded Lady Catherine, intruding in my thoughts once again, “while I teach the men the proper way to bow.”
“She’s just a ray of sunshine,” Jane snickered as soon as Lady Catherine diverted her attention to the men.
I giggled and did a perfect curtsy, if I did say so myself.
“Impressive.” Jane clapped. “I’m going to try. I’ve been watching Regency-era YouTube videos for days now, learning how to do it.”
Yep, she was definitely my kind of woman. If I hadn’t had Fitz to teach me, that’s what I would have done too. But I did have Fitz, and I wanted to keep it that way, even if that meant staying just friends.
Jane executed the perfect curtsy, and I clapped for her. “Good job.”
Our poormamawas not having the same luck, and being paired with Winnifred didn’t help matters.
“You’re doing it all wrong. Straighten your back, and don’t be so dramatic this time.”
Mrs. Bennet was better at being assertive than I was. “I don’t know who you think you are.” She snapped her fingers right in front of Winnifred’s face. “But you’d better drop the attitude. Most of us are here to enjoy ourselves, so stop trying to ruin it. Maybe if you jumped off your high horse, you might have some fun too.”
I loved Mrs. Bennet. She was my new hero.
Winnifred blinked and blinked, so stunned someone would call her out. “Well, I was just trying to help you not look like a fool.” She spun on her heel and marched off.
“That was amazing,” I sang as I curtsied to her. “I bow down to you.”
“That stick thing probably just needs to eat some carbs.” Mrs. Bennet laughed. “Glucose is a beautiful thing.”
While I agreed about glucose, I wasn’t sure carbs were going to make Winnifred any nicer. I don’t even think landing Fitz would fix her attitude.
Mrs. Bennet wrapped her arms around Jane and me. “You just come to me if that one bothers you.”
Oh, I had a feeling Winnifred had more in store for me, but I wasn’t sure if Mrs. Bennet could protect me from her wrath. Regardless, I truly appreciated her willingness to try.
I leaned my head against Mrs. Bennet. “Thank you.”
We broke apart when Lady Catherine began listing when and to whom we should bow or curtsy. Apparently, all children in that era bowed or curtsied to their parents the first time they saw them each day. I could never imagine doing that to my dad, but it would be fun to do it for the next week. I really wanted to immerse myself in the experience—and especially in Mr. Darcy.
