I'm trying to keep my cool, but inside, I'm starting to see the humor in the situation, especially when a gob of cheese and beans falls from Kade's hair onto the table with a plop. I nearly lose it when Kade looks down at it and slowly leans toward the table as if he's about to eat it.
"Don't you fucking think about it," I snap in my best annoyed big brother voice.
Kade sighs and leans back in his chair, a look of pure disappointment on his face. "But I'm so hungry," he whines. All six-plus feet of him slumps over in the chair
Finally, they get the whole story out. "Cara and Becca are at the Dojo, and we were hungry," Kade explains, as if that justifies the entire situation.
"In a burrito mood," Declan adds, nodding sagely. "A deep, soul-consuming burrito mood."
"Big fucking surprise," I mutter, rolling my eyes.
"So we went to the corner store. The good one, with all the slushie machines. And we scooped out a bunch of burritos from the freezer, but we couldn't decide who got to warm theirs up first, so we decided to put them all in at once," Kade continues, gesturing wildly with his hands.
"How many?" I ask, dreading the answer.
Kade and Declan look at each other, then shrug in unison. "I don't know, man. It was like a burrito party in there," Kade says, a hint of pride in his voice.
I sigh and drop into a chair, the weight of their stupidity pressing down on me.
"Then what happened?"
"Well, we figured it would take a while, cause there were so many, so we set it for twenty minutes. Then we got some slurpees and waited next to the microwave, you know, just talking, mind our own business," Kade explains.
"Then some kids came in and were shit-talking us, so that took some time. We had to put them in their place, obviously," Declan adds, puffing out his chest.
"Then next thing you know, Boom! Burritos everywhere. That shit burns," Kade says, wincing at the memory.
"I don't really understand why it blew up. It was just burritos," Kade says, looking pitiful. "I mean, I thought burritos were our friends, man. They betrayed us." Declan nods solemnly.
Cadence lays her head against the wall, snorting with laughter. And I have to dig my fingernails into my palms to keepthe fucking giggles at bay. My brothers are complete children, but at heart, I am too. And they look so pathetic, the both of them, a mixture of red patches from cheese burns, and burrito filling splattered all over them.
The door opens, and a plainclothes cop walks in. His nose wrinkles, and he shakes his head at my brothers before extending his hand to me. "Maverick."
I shake it, giving him an apologetic smile. "Thomas. I'm sorry to see you again like this." Detective Thomas Hilliard is one of the good guys. And pretty fucking patient. Maybe that’s why he always ends up being the one to handle our shit. I sometimes wonder if they don’t rock paper scissors it out, the loser has to deal with us. Either way, he’s not an asshole, and that’s saying a lot.
He grunts and drops the file he's holding on the table. "Yeah, well I hadn't seen you in a while. Figured you boys were due. But this?" He eyes Declan and Kade, grimacing. "This is a little much. It smells like the shitter in a Mexican restaurant in here."
Cadence wheezes behind me. Thomas shifts to look at her, and grins as we watch her slide down the wall into a slumped, laughing heap on the floor. "I see you brought a friend?"
Something in me rises up, something instinctive. I shift until I'm blocking his view. "We were on a date when dumb and dumbest called. And I'd love to get back to it. So what are we looking at?"
Thomas flips open the file, and I can see the charges listed. Criminal mischief, destruction of property, and disturbing the peace. Fuck. This is going to be a headache.
"The owner's pretty pissed, boys," Thomas says, looking between Kade and Declan. "She's talking about banning you from the store."
"What? No!" Kade protests, his eyes wide with horror. "That's the closest convenience store! They have the best selection of snacks!"
Declan nods vigorously in agreement. "Slushies! We can't lose our snack hookup."
Thomas levels them with a stare that could melt steel. "The poor woman is still trying to scrub burnt cheese off her ceiling."
Kade and Declan shut up real quick at that. I sigh, rubbing my temples. We need to fix this, and fast. I can't have my brothers getting charged with this shit.
"Look, Thomas," I say, leaning forward. "Let's work something out. No need to bring charges, right? Kade and Declan will personally help get the place cleaned up."
Thomas raises an eyebrow, and I can see the skepticism written all over his face. "You think these two can handle that?"
I glance at my brothers, who are looking at me with a mixture of hope and apprehension. "Well, maybe not as good as a professional crew. But we're happy to pay for the cleaning. We'll replace the microwave too, and cover her lost revenue while she's closed for clean up."
