“Hey,” John said, his voice quiet but firm. “You arenotstupid. Don't you ever say that. You were upset, and nobody really speaks clearly when they're upset. And your dad, being a dad, probably heard as far as the mention of my bed and didn't hear anything after that.”
“Yeah, maybe,” Adam conceded, trying to wipe away his tears even as more fell.
John pulled out a handkerchief and blotted Adam's face. He sat back on his heels, eyeing the phone, then took a deep breath. “You can listen to it if you want. Just…maybe wait until I'm out of the room.”
Adam looked down at the phone, the screen now dark. He considered it. Listening to his dad's voicemail greeting wasn't enough. Yes, it was his dad's voice, but it was the man's business voice. The chipper one he'd used for greeting customers, tenants, and associates. It didn't have his deep laugh or his slight drawl or any emotional inflection whatsoever.
But if this voicemail was what John suspected it might be, Adam wasn't sure he wanted to hear that, either.
Adam pushed the phone away and shook his head. “I don't want to hear him angry,” he gasped. “I don't want to remember him that way.”
“Okay,” John agreed, taking his hands. “That's okay.”
Adam let out a shuddering breath. “How come you've never deleted it if you don't want to listen to it?”
A hint of color rose up on John's cheeks. “I know I'll regret it. Having never known what his final words were to me. Yet I still can't seem to make myself listen to it.” John shook his head. “Deep down, I know it's all irrelevant now, considering how much time has passed and the fact that he's not here anymore. But, still…” John shrugged.
“No, I get it,” Adam said. “Just like I can't let go of Dad's stuff, yet I can't bear to look through it all, either.”
Though he knew he needed to do so. Adam couldn't believe what a difference it had made, just going through his kitchen and boxing up things he didn't want or need. Clearing out all that physical space had felt like clearing out a big chunk of the noise inside his head. Even knowing he'd be alone in the apartment now that Haven was moving out, he almost couldn't wait to get back home. He wasn't ready to touch that third bedroom yet, but the rest of the apartment?
Adam was eager to keep going. He already had a mental list of things to get rid of and he couldn't wait to get them into boxes.
Before either he or John could say anything, a tentative knock sounded on the door.
“You guys decent in there?” Theo called.
Adam barked a laugh, and John turned bright red. While John put his phone away and went back to fussily tidying his desk, Adam wiped his cheeks, got up, and went to open the door. “That depends,” he said once he had the door standing wide. “I mean, if you guys are into voyeurism…”
Haven blushed, Theo laughed, and John turned impossibly redder.
“Come on,” Adam said to John as he gestured at the other two. “You justknowthey've christened the tasting room. I'd almost bet my life on it. In fact, I'm guessing that's how Theo managed to forget his wallet last night.”
Theo and Haven shared a look, and the latter shyly muttered, “No comment.”
“You ready to go?” Theo asked Adam. “John? You're welcome to join us.”
John cleared his throat and shook his head. “I just ate, but thanks.”
Adam's phone beeped with a notification for a new text message. He held up a finger and pulled the phone from his pocket. The lockscreen showed a preview of a message from Trevor. Adam opened the text and blinked dumbly at the single word.
Trevor: MOTHERFUCKER
The hell?Adam quickly texted him back.
Me: What's wrong?
Trevor: They canceled the tour!
Another message came through, a long string of crying face emojis, followed by a clarification that the Florida show was out.
Me: Shit, dude! I'm so sorry.
“Baby?” John asked. “You okay?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah.” Adam gestured with his phone. “Sorry. It's Trev. They were supposed to open for a big-name band, but apparently the tour got canceled.”
While everyone made noises of commiseration, another message came through.
