Page 34 of Blood and War
“You’re here early.” He grinned, collapsing on the bed beside her. His arm draped lazily over her when she scooted in closer.
“I wanted to see you is all.” She shrugged.
“Oh?” He elbowed her rib in a playful manner, and she could practically hear the grin in his voice without having to look over.
“Don’t let it go to your head, Smith.” The laughter came easy with him. It always did. “Stressful meeting today?” She asked, staring up at the painfully white stucco ceiling above them.
“Yeah… Augustus sent a man over early. There’s been another raid.” Demitria could feel her stomach churning at his words. Her body froze, despite the warmth of him beside her.
Another demon attack. They were getting more and more frequent. She wouldn’t ask which community. Just another thing for her to feel guilty about.
“This isn’t on you.” Jace said, voice matter of fact. She could feel his eyes piercing into her. “I know you think these attacks are your fault after that demon, but it isn’t. This war is not your fault.” She tried to believe him, but it just got so hard. With the death of their family still so fresh in her mind once more, and her own death looming over her head, she didn’t know what to believe anymore. Was she paying a price like Kellan had? She wondered if she was being condemned from something she hadn’t even committed yet. Like she’d been set on a course for some mass destruction in the future that truly would tip the balance of their worlds. Was that why so many of these beings seemed to want her dead? Had she done something so bad that she was being punished?
“I know.” The words hadn’t come easy, but she’d said them anyway. If anything, to put his mind at ease. The less he worried about her the better. “As much as I enjoy your company, I did have a reason to come here.”
"Do you ever really need a reason?” He asked.
“No, but I still need to talk to you about something.”
“You’re leaving, aren’t you?” His gaze still hadn’t left her, and she didn’t dare turn toward him now. “With him, just like he said.”
“It’s… complicated.” She sighed, finding a pattern in the swirls of the ceiling. Anything to keep her from meeting his eyes.
“Then uncomplicate it for me.”
“Jace, I—” She refused to tell him about the demon. About what the thing had said to her. How it remembered that day…knowing that if he knew the truth, he’d lock her away someplace he thought was safe. He’d probably try and go after the monster himself, and she couldn’t let that happen. Finally, she turned to him. “Do you trust me?” She stared into those familiar green eyes that had been her lifeline time and time again. The sharp features of his face.
“With my life.” He answered.
“Then know that I wouldn’t leave without a valid reason. I went further than I’d ever gone while I was out there. Saw things… heard things that I can’t stomach the words to repeat.” She wasn’t lying, per say, but withholding some of the information. But all of it was her truths. “When I go with him, it’s to keep you safe.” Demitria touched her fingers to his cheek, willing him to believe her.
“Then I’ll go with you. We’ll do whatever it is together.” She could hear the panic rising in his voice. “You don’t have to do this alone.”
“I’m not alone.” That was a lie, and she hated the taste of the words in her mouth. Bitter, sharp, like they burned. “I will come back. I promise you.” It took every fiber of her being to hold back the sob threatening to break through. Because she didn’t know if she’d ever come back. If she’d even survive…
“I can’t let you leave.”
“Jace, you’re my best friend. I’m doing this for you. For us. For everyone in this damn community.” She sighed. “I don’t like it any more than you do.”
“You will come back.” He said, voice stern. Like he was speaking it into existence.Hope.
If she let the conversation continue, Demitria knew she’d break.
“I could stay here all day.” Changing the subject, she let herself curl into his warmth. Jace was quick to hug her body in closer, refusing to let go. He’d been her safety net for so long. She didn’t know what to do now that everything was changing.
So, she focused on the little things. Imprinting them in her mind so she would never forget, not that she ever would. She’d remember the way his arms felt as he held her like there wasn’t anyone else in the world. She’d remember the warmth of their bodies side by side, and the soft soothing caress of his hand on her arm.
She would rememberthem, because she didn’t ever want to let that
Demitria blinked up at the ceiling, willing the room into focus. They’d fallen asleep and had completely wasted the day away. She wouldn’t have changed it, though. Being able to spend the day with him was what she had wanted anyway.
With a yawn, she untangled herself from his muscled frame and stared out the window. Someone had already lit the lamps outside, and the sun had begun to set over the horizon as hues of pinks and reds streaked across the sky. She hoped Jace hadn’t had much to do today, but was grateful for no interruptions. Almost as if they’d known.
Climbing out of the bed, she stretched on aching legs when Jace stirred. He blinked up once, twice, then settled his gaze on her.
“Apparently we slept the entire day.” She laughed, tossing the dark cloak over her shoulders and clasping it at her throat.
“Must have needed the rest.” He shrugged, lifting to his elbows and pushing his own body off the bed. Jace ran a hand through his hair, smoothing out the golden strands that had fallen out of place during their slumber. He grabbed the leather jacket he’d discarded on the chair hours earlier and slipped it back on. “I am absolutely starving. Any plans for dinner?”
