Page 49 of King of Hollywood
It was odd, but I didn’t question it. Not when his skin felt so good against my own. Not overstimulating the way most people felt. If I was Goldilocks, then he was just right.
A couple walked in front of us, their fingers laced together like ours were. They grinned at each other, walking so close they might as well be one person.
“What are your views on marriage?” Felix asked me out of the blue, staring at the couple just like I had been. I hadn’t expected the question, so it took me a second to respond. Glancing down at him—having to crane my neck, he was so short—I frowned.
“What do you mean?”
There was clearly something on his mind. He’d had fun too, I could tell—but there was always this…distance between us. Perhaps this was what had been bothering him?
He had his secrets.
I’d asked him out, despite the fact he didn’t leave his house hardly ever.
Maybe he worried I wasn’t…serious?
“Would you ever get married?” Felix asked, his eyes searching mine, his hand still clutched protectively in my own. He felt so…small. Despite this, the presence he had was unmistakable. Confident. Like he knew exactly who he was—though he hid it away from prying eyes. “Not everyone nowadays wants that.”
“No,” I scoffed immediately, shaking my head. Marriage was not something I had ever contemplated. Even though the fact that I was a thirty-eight-year-old single man was apparently appalling to some people—people who did not hesitate to comment about it. But then…then…I stopped thinking about those people. I stopped thinking about the unwelcome questions, the judgmental looks. The dating apps. The strangers. The people who would ruin my home’s carefully cultivated ecosystem.
Instead, I thought about Felix.
His eyes had clouded over—the lovely swell of his lower lip and the dip at his throat both looked particularly soft. I licked my lips, heart racing.
“Yes,” I amended my statement, voice rough. “With the right person. Maybe.”
All the while, I was completely unable to stop staring at the lovely splotchy flush that blossomed across Felix’s throat—reacting to my words like he knew exactly who I’d been thinking about.
Felix shuffled forward, and I reacted immediately, willingly following his lead. The smile he offered me in exchange for my obedience was ridiculously sweet. The look in his eyes was so full of longing it made me ache.
Felix knew he was my exception.
It was written all over his face.
“What about you?” I asked, suddenly anxious to hear his answer.
“About…me?” He played it cool, and I glared at him till he laughed.
“Would you ever marry?” I reiterated, waiting eagerly for his response—though I did my very best not to look like it. His hand remained clutched in mine, the stupid cat stuffed animal tucked beneath my other arm.
Felix was quiet for a long, long time.
Long enough we passed through the gates that led to the carnival. Long enough that we had time to walk the path that led round the property to the parking lot. There was a…melancholy expression on his face. It was an expression I didn’t truly understand, though I recognized it.
It reminded me of my father’s face after my mother had died. As though Felix was mourning me before I’d even died.
Once again, I felt the distance between us keenly.
What was he thinking about?
There was a puddle in the way, probably from the rain shower that had splattered the crowd a few hours before I’d arrived. I’d been caught in it on my way home from work and was grateful when it passed. However, puddles were inevitable. This was a large one, and Felix had tiny legs.
Without thinking, I picked Felix up and carried him over it before setting him back on solid ground as though nothing had happened. The cat remained tucked safely in my grip.
Felix stared at me for a beat, obviously shocked and delighted by the manhandling. Had no one ever picked him up like that before? I’d have to make a habit to do so more.
Finally, when the parking lot came into view, Felix finally answered my question. His voice was sweet as honey and buttery smooth.
“I would marry,” he said sadly, his hand once again tiny and perfect tucked inside my own. My heart fluttered, but my stomach swooped.
