Page 61 of Conquering Conner
I love him so much I want to scream because I keep hurting him.
And he’ll keep letting me.
Keep asking me to because he thinks it’s what I want. All I want from him and it’s not. I want more. I want everything.
But I can’t have any of it because I made promises.
Promises I no long want to keep.
“I’m opening the bar for an end of the season party,” Patrick says, drawing my attention. “You coming?”
I shake my head, trying to buy myself some time because my throat’s closed up on me. My chest is splitting wide open. I feel a look pass between the two of them over my head and it makes me angry enough to swallow the lump in my throat. “No.” I shake my head again, offering him a flat smile. “I’m not really a part of the team, anyway.”
It’s rude. I’m being rude.
Ladies are always gracious.
Right now I don’t care. I just want to go home and hide. And cry. Maybe even scream a little.
Before I can make my escape, Declan says, “Not so fast, Little Red.” He snags my arm and grins. “Mam wants you to dinner tonight.”
Little Red. That’s what Ryan used to call me. Little Red Hen. I laugh because it sounds weird coming from Declan. Weird and oddly familiar. Right. “I don’t think so,” I say, tugging on my arm. “Please tell her that I—”
“I don’t think you get it, Hen.” Now it’s Declan’s turn to laugh at me. “When Mary Gilroy invites you to Sunday dinner, you come to Sunday dinner—either on your own or she comes and gets you. It’s a long way between here and Boylston and I don’t think you’ll enjoy getting dragged through the neighborhood by your ear.”
Next to me, Patrick makes a commiserating noise in the back of his throat.
I don’t think Conner’s mother would drag me to the elevator and through the lobby of my apartment building by my ear, but I absolutely believe she’s show up on my doorstep and threaten to do it.
“Okay.” I relent. “I’ll come.”
I help gather equipment and load up the van before heading to my own car. Behind the wheel, I take out my phone and send Conner a text.
Me:Your mother invited me
to dinner. Tell me now if you
don’t want me to accept.
He responds almost immediately.
Conner:I know. See you
when you get there.
