“I want that too,” Michael says as his eyes soften, and his grip on my other hand loosens. He moves his hand up my side, along my collarbone and places his fingers around my neck. My pulse quickens, but I stop my eyes from going wide. He enjoys my fear, I won’t let him feed off it anymore.
His fingers grip my throat, not tight enough to really hurt me, but tight enough to let me know that he isn’t fucking around. “You have to understand that I still worry that you’re going to leave me. I’m never going to let that happen, Lucy. You’re mine, and if I can’t have you then no one will.”
His words chill me to the bone and I stop myself from gulping down the lump that has formed in my throat. Instead, I cup his cheek, move my other hand to the one around my throat and gently pull it away. He complies, and I pray to God that this is enough to keep him from losing his cool.
I move my head forward slightly until I place a light kiss on his lips. “I don’t want anyone else. Only you.”
His eyes light up from my words, and if I ever needed a moment to clarify to me that Michael is a fucking lunatic, then this was it. Despite the beatings and the cruel words, his enjoyment at trapping me is insane. It makes no sense to me. Why would anyone want to trap another person?
He runs his tongue along the bottom of my lip and I control my body, stopping it from shuddering like it wants to.
“I’m so glad that you’re finally learning, Lucy,” he says as he nuzzles my neck and wraps his arms around my waist, holding me close to him.
Michael will kill me if he can’t have me, and I’m not prepared to live this life anymore.
One of us won’t recover from this, and I am going to do everything in my power to make sure that I’m no longer a victim.
Michael wouldn’t know true love if it smacked him in the face.
No, the only type of love he knows is the one in hell, and I’m tired of feeling the heat.
Chapter Seven
Learning to dodge
The week has passed by in a miserable blur. Work has been the only thing that has kept my mind occupied from thoughts of everyone that I love hating me. Kim has shot daggers my way whenever she has seen me, Michael has looked more joyful than ever as the week has gone on, and I have had no way of contacting Cal.
My resolve to embrace my inner-strength is waning, rapidly.
I have been racking my brains for a way to see Cal, so that I can explain what I am doing, but so far, I am drawing a blank. I desperately want to talk to him even if it is selfish of me. His parting words, “I fucking love you, Lucy,” have been at the forefront of my mind. He came back from travelling the world to be swept up in my shit-show of a love life, and now he thinks that I have cast him aside.
I don’t want him to think that.
I need to put this right.
As the clock ticks closer to five o’clock, I know that I don’t have long left to try and speak to Kim. It’s my only chance, and I’ve been building up to it all week long.
“I just need to nip to the toilet,” I say, standing up from my seat before Michael can say anything, and before I lose my nerve. I swiftly leave the project room, my heart pounding as I walk straight past the toilets and enter the main office. Rushing over to Kim’s desk, I start to speak before she can tell me to fuck off.
“Kim, I know that things haven’t been great between us recently, and I am so sorry for that,” I start, getting my words out quickly. I don’t have long in which to say what I need to. “I can’t explain to you what is going on, I just need you to trust that I am doing the right thing. I miss you, Kim, and I hate the thought of you wanting nothing to do with me.”
I look at the clock, realising that a couple of minutes have passed since I left the project room. I need to go back before Michael comes looking for me.
“Please, Kim, please just trust me,” I plead, quickly taking two letters out of the waistband of my trousers and placing them on her desk. I folded each letter small enough so that Michael wouldn’t see them.
“Just read the letter with your name on, I beg you. The other letter is for Cal, please, could you give it to him for me?” I desperately hope that she will pass that letter on.
“I have to go,” I say before turning and scurrying from the room. I run to the toilets and lock myself in one of the cubicles, trying to calm my racing heart and trembling body.
A few minutes pass and I let myself out of the cubicle, going to the sinks, running cold water and splashing it on my face. I grab a couple of paper towels and pat my face dry before tossing them in the bin.
With a deep breath, I leave the toilets and come face to face with Michael, just as I knew that I would.
He’s becoming predictable.
Either that or I am becoming more in tune with his way of thinking. I don’t want to be in tune with the bastard at all, but this is all I can do right now.
“What’s taken you so long?” he asks as he peers into the ladies’ toilets before the door shuts.
