Page 83 of The Wedding Proposal
Lucas could hardly believe what he’d been hearing. Fury that Elle hadn’t simply come to him with the truth four years ago warred with shame that she hadn’t felt able to trust him with her fears and fragility. Threatened by that shit of an ex-husband she had borne it all alone, searching for ways out of trouble. She was that scared of disapproval.
His heart contracted that she’d been so unhappy that she’d barely noticed his proposal had been “pretty ordinary”. She had deserved so much better.
He glanced at his parents. His dad’s expression wasn’t betraying much, as usual, but his mum looked disbelieving. He’d seen that look a million times. Fearsome Fiona had made up her mind. He wondered if that was the expression Elle sometimes saw on his face. Cold guilt curled in his stomach as he remembered Fiona referring to Elle as ‘that sort of girl’, and that he’d never asked her not to. He’d simply expected that his parents’ misgivings would fade if he went ahead with his relationship, letting his actions speak louder than words.
He hadn’t wanted to hurt them with a row.
Instead, he’d hurt Elle by not having one.
Elle’s eyes were pink around the edges, now, as she listened to whoever was on the phone. He’d been so engrossed in his churning thoughts that he hadn’t been paying attention to the few words she’d uttered as her part of the conversation. But he snapped back to the present as she prepared to ring off.
‘Thank you for letting me know. I understand. Leave it with me. I’ll be there as soon as I can.’ She ended the call and posted the phone back into her pocket. Her face was white under her freckles but she seemed composed. ‘That was Nerys at The Briars. They can’t have Mum back under the level of care we’ve been paying for. I need to establish whether they can care for her with her new needs or if I have to find somewhere else.’
Lucas immediately thrust his anger and confusion aside. Or maybe he was glad of a reason to reach for her.
But she shrank from his arms. ‘No, don’t. Not just out of pity because you think something’s going wrong for me. Mum’s care’s too hard to try and organise from here. I’m going back to England.’
Lucas could hardly believe his ears. ‘England?’ he repeated, idiotically.
Elle was already moving to extricate herself from the sofa. She went on in the same colourless voice. ‘It’s best. It’ll give you plenty of time to think. And I need space, too. A lot of it.’
Hardly knowing what he was doing, Lucas stood up to allow her out from behind the table.
Her smile twisted and her eyes were full of tears as she gripped his hand hard between both of hers. ‘Do you remember me saying I learned from my parents never to own up? I’m glad you didn’t let me when I tried to. At least, this way, we’ve had this time.’
She turned to Fiona. ‘Sorry Ricky tried it on with you. I can imagine that you must have felt vindicated, that you’d been right to be suspicious of me.’ She let a pause draw out. ‘I did think that you lawyers usually go on evidence and that pesky “innocent until proven guilty” thing. But don’t worry, I’m not going to fight you. I wouldn’t try and get Lucas to throw away parents that show their love this much.’
Neither parent seemed to have an answer. It was Lucas who found his voice, to say, ‘That’s pretty magnanimous of you, in the circumstances.’
Elle groaned in frustration, her blue eyes suddenly on fire. ‘I’m not being magnanimous! I’m being bitter. Like most things, it’s not as black and white as you make it. Your family, you live by different rules. There are a few concepts you guys need to learn about, like compromise, valuing people for what they are, there being more than one way to look at things. People being normal, imperfect human beings.’
She turned and left the saloon, slipping out through the sliding doors like a dream vanishing at dawn.
Shock giving sudden power to his legs, Lucas started after her. ‘Elle—!’
He gained the cockpit in time to see her picking up pace along the quayside. Her voice floated back to him. ‘Give me space, Lucas. I really need it.’ Defeat was in the droop of her shoulders and the angle of her head.
Shock and lack of sleep took the power from his legs and he dropped down on the cockpit seat to watch her go until other boats obscured his line of sight. Now he knew what truths had been balanced on her lips that night he’d resolved to put the past behind them, and why she’d stayed silent. He was both ashamed and grateful.
A hand landed softly on his shoulder and his mother said, ‘It might be for the best.’
He shook her off. ‘Not for me.’ Then, strength returning to his limbs, he jumped up and off the boat, hitting the ground running, focused only on catching up with Elle.
At the foot of Seadancer’s gangplank, though, he hesitated. It wasn’t that he was shy about disregarding etiquette and barging his way onto someone else’s boat but that he was suddenly convinced that it was the wrong thing. Racing along the quayside, dodging mooring lines and fishermen and a motor scooter delivering pizzas, he’d formulated flash plans of helping her pack, booking her flight, calling her a taxi, seeing her to the airport. Even packing a bag and going with her back to England, though he knew Vern would take a very dim view.
Give me space. Her voice rang in his head, filled with frustration and disillusion.
He snatched out his phone and sent her a text. Can I help? What do you want me to do?
The reply came in seconds. No, thanks. I don’t want you to do anything.
He glared at his phone screen. That wasn’t the answer he’d wanted.
He hit ‘Reply’ and his thumb hovered over the keys. So, what was he going to do — insist? Disregard her wishes? Demand assurances of her return? Eventually, he texted a kiss, waited, and then turned away and trailed back to the Shady Lady. He jumped back on board.
In the saloon, his parents had freshened their gin and tonics. ‘Kayleigh’s asked us if we’d like to meet her for dinner,’ said Fiona, tentatively. ‘I think she’s feeling the shock now the drama’s over and would appreciate our support.’
Lucas drifted to a stop. ‘I expect she would.’
