Page 12 of Scorned
Obviously, I was delusional. We had no clue of his whereabouts or whether he was dead.
I hadn’t told anyone, and I hated myself for this, but I’d given up on believing Luka was still alive.
“You can be pissed at me all you want, Sage, but unlike most of these cowardly people around here, I won’t give up on you,” Winnie ranted. “And after that shit you pulled earlier, I’m not going to tiptoe around, worried you’ll break. I don’t give a fuck. I’ll continue to give you hell until the fiery girl I know comes back.”
Was I that bad? Were people afraid to talk to me? Afraid I would break? Possibly, but without Luka, life meant nothing to me anymore.
“Leave her alone,” Lyric interrupted. “She misses Luka.”
She was constantly defending me, and I knew kindness and love motivated the act, but it further proved my already unstable image.
I whipped my body back around. “I don’t need you to defend me, Lyric.”
With unhuman quickness, Winnie had me by the waist before I even realized he moved, and within seconds, my body plummeted into icy water. The cold stung my skin as I sank to the bottom. After a second of contemplating if I wanted to drown and end my suffering, I pushed my feet against the muddy lake floor and hastily made my way to the surface. The air rushed into my lungs, my body forcing me to suck in a hard breath.
“What the fuck!” I screamed, wading to the edge of the lake. “Are you trying to piss me off?”
Winnie flung his arms out. “Please get mad. Please fight me! Do something other than stand there staring into the woods, eat soup, and wither the fuck away!”
When I stood up in shallow water, a shiver ran through me, and I was unsure if it was from the chilly night air or from his words.
I averted my eyes and they landed on a lily pad clinging to my shoulder before I plucked it off. “This was unnecessary.”
“You think? It seems fitting to me since water lilies are a symbol for resurrection and rebirth in many cultures.”
Winnie’s face was stone-cold when my gaze met his again. Colder than the lake I stood in.
“I’m still alive, Asshole. I don’t need to be resurrected!”
The way he narrowed his gaze on me, I knew his words were about to hurt. “Are you sure about that, Sage? Because it seems like you died when they took Luka.”
Even though I expected his meanness, because apparently being kind to me hadn’t worked, his words still hit me like a boulder. An aching pain settled in my chest and tears filled my eyes.
Winnie said nothing, instead shaking his head, his own eyes brimming with emotion before he turned away.
Peach came to the edge of the water, extending her hand with a kind and compassionate face. “Come on, Kid.”
Kid.
Knowing that’s the nickname she used for Luka made my chest hurt even more as I trudged my way toward her. She pulled me from the lake, and I did everything in my power to push back my emotions.
“Thanks.”
Embarrassed and pissed, I stomped off toward my cabin, and when I entered, I slammed the door shut, slouching against it.
Every emotion that ever existed bubbled in the pit of my stomach, slowly crawling up my chest, looking for an exit. I took a deep breath, blowing it out through pursed lips.
Water dripped from my clothes, each drop landing on the floor like a sympathy of misery. Cold air washed over my body, sending shivers through me and puckering my skin.
I was about to go get cleaned up when Chewy rubbed on my legs with his purr on high before he pulled away, seeming confused by my wetness. I bent down and patted his head for a second, my teeth chattering.
“I’ll cuddle you when I get out of the shower,” I promised him before I stumbled to the bathroom, flipped on the light, and shut the door behind me.
Pulling Luka’s T-shirt over my head, I dropped it on the floor, and more sadness filled me. I’d almost died getting it earlier and it was the last one that still smelled like him. Now it stunk of lake water. I removed his sweatpants next before glimpsing my reflection.
The dark wooden mirror over the sink became my enemy as it revealed my true self. The woman staring back, now a stranger. A lifeless meat sack with no will to live.
My once-full face appeared somber, hollow. Dark circles hugged my eyes like the night sky hugged the moon. It looked as if I hadn’t slept in weeks, which was true. Between thoughts of Luka and nightmares, sleep had been almost non-existent for the last five months.
