Jessie reached across the table, her touch reassuring. “Izzy, don’t let something like age dictate your happiness. What matters is how you feel about each other.”
Natalia leaned in, her gaze earnest. “Iz, I know you. And if I can be honest, sometimes it feels like you’re the one holding yourself back, convincing yourself someone’s not right for you even when they’re standing right there.”
Emma nodded, her voice gentle. “It’s tough, isn’t it? We grow up with all these voices telling us how our lives should unfold. Sometimes, without even realizing it, we start believing those voices more than our own desires. I mean, look at me: I left what I thought was my dream job for something completely different. Scary, yes, but so worth it.”
Their words, a blend of challenge and support, forced me to confront my own barriers. Was I the one pushing Max away, veiled under the guise of protecting myself from potential judgment? Their insights, wrapped in layers of friendship and understanding, left me pondering the choices I had made—and the ones still before me.
TWENTY-SIX
ISABELLA
Twenty-three days. That’s how long it had been since Max had set his boundaries about us.
Not that I was keeping track.
With the encouragement of the girls and my growing desire to release the expectations others had placed on me, it was time to create something of my own. This desire for a new beginning led me to the concept of WanderLand, my own event-planning venture. It was a name and idea that surfaced after nights of introspection and scribbled notes in my journal during moments of hope and ambition. WanderLand was more than a business—it was my declaration of independence, a promise to pursue what brought joy and creativity into my life and the lives of others.
Embarking on this entrepreneurial journey felt like diving into uncharted waters. I dedicated days to researching, plotting out services, and connecting with potential clients, driven by a blend of nerves and excitement. Securing my first event, a private wine and cheese party my mom would host, felt like a victory, a tangible sign that WanderLand wasn’t just a dream but a reality taking shape.
As I sat in the bustling coffee shop, the hum of conversation and the clatter of cups forming a backdrop to my focused intent, I couldn’t help but feel a twinge of something like liberation. With each sip of my latte, I felt more grounded in my decision, more certain this venture was not just a distraction but a meaningful step forward, a way to blend creativity with connection, weaving the magical with the tangible.
The coffee shop, with its rustic charm and the aroma of freshly ground beans, was the perfect spot for creativity to flourish. I chose a corner table, a strategic spot allowing me to observe the ebb and flow of city life through the large, paneled windows, while still offering a semblance of privacy.
Across from me sat Cara, the artsy vibe evident in her vibrant scarf and the array of colorful tattoos peeking out from her rolled-up sleeves. Her hair was a cascade of loose curls, and her eyes sparkled with creativity as they focused intently on the digital tablet before her. Her fingers moved with a dancer’s grace, tapping and swiping as she brought our ideas to life.
“Okay, Izzy, think whimsical journeys, enchanted escapes, but with a touch of urban sophistication,” Cara said, her voice a melodious blend of excitement and concentration.
I leaned in, my eyes scanning the array of logo concepts she had compiled. Each design was unique, yet they all captured the essence of what I envisioned for WanderLand. “Yes, exactly that,” I replied, my voice tinged with awe and a hint of relief. “It’s like you’ve plucked the ideas right out of my head.”
Cara chuckled, her fingers pausing momentarily. “Well, that’s the goal, isn’t it? To make WanderLand not just a name but a story in itself. Something that instantly transports people.”
I nodded, my mind momentarily drifting to those evenings spent under foreign skies, the thrill of discovering the unknown. This sense of adventure, mingled with the elegance of curated experiences, was what I wanted to encapsulate.
Cara tapped on her tablet, bringing up a design that immediately caught my eye. The logo seemed to swirl and dance, its lines flowing like trails on a map yet forming a cohesive, elegant image. “How about this one?” she asked, her voice laced with a hint of pride.
“That’s it,” I breathed out, a smile spreading across my face. “It’s perfect.”
After finalizing the logo and discussing branding colors, I hugged Cara and settled back into my corner seat. I’d ordered another latte. Whoever said four espresso shots in one day was a bad idea? There, amidst the grind of coffee beans, I filled out the online paperwork to officially file WanderLand as an LLC. My fingers hesitated for a moment before hitting the “submit” button. This was more than just a formality. It was a commitment to a new chapter, a leap into the unknown.
Once I was sufficiently jittery from way too much caffeine, I stepped out of the coffee shop, the new logo for WanderLand in my hands acting as a beacon for my growing business. With every step, my stride grew more confident. WanderLand, once just a concept, was now becoming a reality, a tangible expression of my passions and dreams.
As I walked, my phone buzzed with a reminder of the photoshoot scheduled for tomorrow. It was with Luca, an old school friend-turned-professional photographer. The thought of capturing the essence of WanderLand through his lens was exhilarating.
Lingering in that thought, I found myself tempted to reach out to Max. My fingers hovered over my phone, itching to send him a screenshot of the newly finalized logo or ask his opinion on the final locations for tomorrow’s photoshoot. I imagined his reaction—that easy smile spreading across his face, the gentle teasing laced with genuine interest. Max always had a way of making even the smallest achievements feel monumental.
But then I hesitated, my thumb hovering over the send button. This was the line I had drawn, wasn’t it? To keep things casual, to not entangle our lives more than they already were. And deep down, there was a part of me that suspected Max’s feelings ran deeper than I thought. It wasn’t just fun and games for him. There was something in the way he looked at me, a certain earnestness that I couldn’t quite return.
Sending him updates, and sharing these snippets of my life, it wouldn’t be fair. Not when each exchange might give him hope and might lead him to believe there was more to us than there really was. It was a selfish comfort to want his support and his enthusiasm when I wasn’t ready to offer him the same in return.
I locked my phone and slipped it back into my purse, a small pang of regret echoing in my chest. I wanted to share these moments with him, to include him in this journey I was so passionate about. But that wasn’t the choice I had made. I had to respect the boundaries I had set, even if it meant walking through these milestones alone.
As I continued down the street, my mind filled with plans and possibilities, there was a small, nagging voice in the back of my head. It murmured of what could be, of shared dreams and mutual support. But those were whispers in the wind, fleeting and intangible. I was building something of my own, and that had to be enough. For now.
* * *
The next day dawned bright and beautiful, the perfect setting for a photoshoot. I dressed with careful consideration, aiming for a look both professional and inviting, reflecting the essence of my new venture. I settled on a crisp black pantsuit, its blazer boasting a deep V-cut that added an edge to the ensemble. To complete the look, I chose a simple gold necklace, allowing it to glimmer subtly against the dark fabric. My hair, rebellious in its curls, framed my face in a way I was hoping came across as effortless.
Stepping outside, I was enveloped by the vibrant energy of New York City. The streets were alive with the rhythm of daily life—people bustling by, the distant honk of taxis, and the faint rustle of trees lining the block. I made my way down the stoop of my parents’ home in Gramercy Park, an ideal location for the shoot.
