Page 14 of Bones
I swallow rapidly trying to take it all down. I sit up once he’s done and I am confident I won’t throw up. He doesn’t bother saying anything as he rises to his feet and heads to the main floor to the only functioning bathroom. I get the bucket in the corner that he thankfully empties a few times a week.
Once he’s gone, I burrow under the covers to stay warm. He hasn’t given me clothes since that day he cut them off me two years ago, so I mostly stay in bed for fear of catching hypothermia. He doesn’t let me leave the basement except for at mealtimes where I sit on the floor by his feet, my “rightful” place.
“Come on, we are going out.” He yells down from the top of the stairs, his voice cheery as if this will be a pleasant family outing and not another way for him to manipulate me and exhort his control over me. I take my time heading upstairs, dreading being near him more than absolutely necessary. He nods his head over toward the living room where he has placed a pair of jeans and a shirt over the arm of the couch for me. “Get dressed we need to go grocery shopping.” He turns away and walks toward the kitchen to get himself a cup of coffee. I quickly dress making sure to not make any sound. Just as he likes it.
He walks back in, sipping loudly. “Good. Now put on your shoes and let’s go.” He commands turning and heading toward the door, not even waiting to see if I will do as he said, my obedience expected. By the time I reach the door his hand is firmly clasped behind my neck, gripping me by the scruff like a disobedient dog. “You will be a good little girl when we get there. You will listen and if I even think you are trying to signal someone for help, I will torture you beyond anything you’ve been through thus far. You will beg me for a death that I will never give you.” He growls in my ear. I swallow harshly and I know he can feel it through his fingertips and nod.
I climb into the passenger’s seat of the car, rolling down the window slightly in order to breath in the fresh air. It’s been so long since I’ve been outside, since I’ve breathed in more than mold and dirt. My eyes close as I take deep gulping breaths. The feel of the warm sunshine hitting my cheeks, the wind whipping through my hair reminds me of being on the back of Bones’ bike. The freedom of the open road and the feel of his hand on my thigh while we rode. I swallow down the lump in my throat, forcing back the tears.
God, I miss him. I would do anything, give anything to see him again.
Chapter Ten
Bones (24)
I’ve looked everywhere for her, for years, I searched high and low doing everything in my power to try and find her. It’s days like this when the air is warm, and the sun is bright that I miss her the most; that I’m reminded of all I’ve lost. The regrets eat away at me. I was too much of a fuckin’ coward to tell her how I felt the one and only night I spent with her, and I’ll never get the chance.
“Bones!” Someone yells and I’m shakin’ from my drunkin’ thoughts. It’s my normal state at this point.
“What?” I snap back, not in the mood for any one’s bullshit today.
“What the fuck’s up your dick?” Tank huffs as he eyes my beer, not giving a single fuck that it’s only 8:30 in the morning.
“Nothin’.” I grunt, not bothering to go into detail as I take a few big gulps. It’s been like this since she left. Gone is the nice guy who gave a shit what people thought of him, gone is my mother’s heart. Nope, now I’m the ruthless asshole that my dad always hoped I’d be and I couldn’t give any less fucks. Honestly, I think even the sweet-butts are gettin’ tired of me and my cruel ways. Oh well, I’m gettin’ tired of their used-up pussies too.
“Whatever, dude. I just wanted to tell you we need to hit up the store. I guess Elana is wantin’ to make some shit or something.” He shrugs.
“Fine,” I growl, already reaching for the keys in my pocket.
“Nope, gotta take the cage.” He lifts his free hand dangling the car keys between his two fingers.
“Whatever, just hurry the fuck up.” I take off without waiting for him, heading for the front door, making sure to kill my beer before tossin’ it into the trash on the way out.
“Jesus fuck, your’a dick.” He mumbles as he hustles after me. I slide into the passenger’s side since I’d already blow over the limit, and I ain’t risking havin’ the police up our ass.
“Can we go to the store a few towns over? I’ve been craving the donuts from that one joint.” He side-eyes me like he’s prayin’ I won’t bite his head off. I really don’t want to go all that way but honestly, I don’t feel like bein’ back at the clubhouse right now anyway.
“Fine.” I grumble before turning up the radio, so he doesn’t try to talk to me.
Thirty minutes later, he’s pulling into the parking lot of the strip mall that has the donut place. He shuts the car off and hops out, headin’ inside without even asking if I want anything. I huff out a breath and lean my head back against the seat, enjoying the good buzz I got goin’.
I hear Tank mumble somethin’ about tearing up some donuts as he gets back in the car, his mouth already stuffed with one, looks like one an’a half donuts. I shake my head at him before I open my door and get out. He can find me when he’s done eatin’ his donuts.
I glance around the parking lot, always vigilant that no one’s followin’ us. After what happened with Beth, I can’t help but look for her, even on the off chance that she might be there. I know it’s not realistic and I know the odds are slim to none, but I can’t help hoping. Not noticing anything out of the ordinary, I walk across the street and into the large grocery store, makin’ sure to grab a cart as I enter the store. Elana always wants a bunch’a shit.
I walk around for a moment, throwin’ some more beer into the cart as well as eggs and bacon for breakfast, since I have no clue what it was that Elana wanted to make.
A few minutes later Tank joins me his beard covered in powdered sugar and raspberry jelly on his lips. “Jesus, dude.” I shake my head at him.
“What?” He looks at me like he’s confused. I don’t even bother responding.
“So, what was it that Elana needed us to get?” I ask already fed up with him and this trip.
He dusts off his hands and reaches into his pocket before pulling out a tiny slip of paper that I can see has writing on the other side. He hands it to me. I look over the ingredients and can see she plans on making lasagna, so I head toward the pasta aisle. I grab the noodles off the shelf and as I’m turning to walk toward the next aisle a voice catches my attention.
My body freezes up and I yank the cart to a stop, almost crashing into Tanks large frame. There’s no fuckin’ way. I listen for a moment, hoping to hear it again, but all I can hear is the chatter of the other people in the store. Needin’ to know if what I heard wasn’t just a figment of my imagination, I hurry down the next aisle toward where I heard the voice last, abandoning the cart and Tank, hoping to hear it again.
My heart slams into my ribs so hard I swear I almost throw up as my eyes meet her mossy green ones. Her face is different. Her cheeks less rounded, skin deathly pale, and her hair is longer but it’s her. There’s no doubt in my mind. I’d recognize those lost, hopeless eyes anywhere.
